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bumpy roads: It will go away. [- PD's -]

http://bumpysroad.blogspot.com/2008/03/it-will-go-away-pds.html

Sunday, March 9, 2008. It will go away. [- PD's -]. It will go away. It will. It has too. It must. I am sick and tired of living this way. Okay, 'it' won't go-away. But 'it' will lessen. That's what I desire and that's what I now believe yet far too often I still find myself swimming in thoughts of despair. It's not even summertime and I find myself soaked. It will go away. Them Objects. Things. Sub-Standard. Less-than-human. A set of people that are all the same with the 'same' everything. HPD in Me - H...

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bumpy roads: Calm - Abbreviated [-HPD-]

http://bumpysroad.blogspot.com/2008/02/calm-abbreviated-hpd.html

Tuesday, February 12, 2008. Calm - Abbreviated [-HPD-]. Calm A simple word. Four letters. In my early forties now, it could be said that I am calming as a result of time and maturity. To an extent this may be true -but it would be minimal. The fact is, I have grown tired of the looping roller coaster. The rackety ride on an unending frenzy of twists, dips, highs, and lows. The clank-clank-clank of my struggles to ascend to a new height to again take joy in a blazing descent. My HPDinMe YouTube Channel.

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bumpy roads: Histrionic Personality Disorder - A Public Service Announcement

http://bumpysroad.blogspot.com/2008/05/histrionic-personality-disorder-public.html

Thursday, May 29, 2008. Histrionic Personality Disorder - A Public Service Announcement. 8226; • • C A U T I O N • • •. The following video is a real depiction of person with histrionic personality disorder conveying a message. This person is doing something, while telling others about what Histrionics do that probably ALL Histrionics love to do. Caution, You' ve been warned. For more information on Histrionic Personality Disorder and an individual's take on Borderline Personality Disorder. A technique o...

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bumpy roads: Normalcy.... Blah? Heck No... YEAH!!!!!

http://bumpysroad.blogspot.com/2008/06/normalcy-blah-heck-no-yeah.html

Wednesday, June 18, 2008. Heck No. YEAH! Normal. What is normal? As a kid, nothing in my life was normal. Nothing. With my mother's behavior and the fighting between her and my dad (divorced) and their using me as tool. And all the abuse (sexual, mental and emotional) that I had and was still enduring. Nothing in my life was normal. I taught myself to ignore the pain, to block it out and to live in a twisted life of self deceit and fantasy. And guess what. that made me 'special' and being special...If yo...

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bumpy roads: Leave the world alone.... cut 'em some slack!

http://bumpysroad.blogspot.com/2008/02/leave-world-alone-cut-em-some-slack.html

Monday, February 25, 2008. Leave the world alone. cut 'em some slack! I've got to work on boundaries more. Still. Again. Some- more. Over and Over I go -it seems. I have realized that I still have "anger" issues. I get too mad, too easily, at times. Generally I find this to be largely applicable to just certain people -those I am closest too. Sounds a bit Borderline doesn't it? Well, it's not. Oh well. no time to keep writing -for now. I gotta get to work. That's a boundary I'm working on too. I am all a...

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bumpy roads: The Bridge and the Borderline

http://bumpysroad.blogspot.com/2008/02/bridge-and-borderline_24.html

Sunday, February 24, 2008. The Bridge and the Borderline. Well much water has passed beneath the bridge in the past thirty days. Cleaning waters from the river of disorder and its rapids of chaos. I've crossed the bridge, over and beyond the borderline. Four months have past since setting foot onto that bridge. It took two more to get across it. Here I am. Free and alive. Goodbye my love. I am sorry. I am sorry for you, but I will no longer let my tears fall into your waters. My HPDinMe YouTube Channel.

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bumpy roads: Blocking a post - Healing

http://bumpysroad.blogspot.com/2008/06/blocking-post-healing.html

Saturday, June 14, 2008. Blocking a post - Healing. I have decided to block (at least 'temporarily') the video that are in the prior post insight-into-my-therapeautic-process. As they contain data that is not only perhaps to private. but they cover topics that have opened up a number of other venues in my recovery that I am 'learning' right now. Until I have a better understanding of that kind of stuff i thinks best to keep the videos that discuss them and lead into them off the air so to speak. I also h...

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bumpy roads: Many things are in front of me [-HPD-]

http://bumpysroad.blogspot.com/2008/02/many-things-are-in-front-of-me.html

Friday, February 1, 2008. Many things are in front of me [-HPD-]. It's done. I have them. I look back to these and I see both a young man that is tackling head-on a series of problems in his life that are greatly attributed from childhood sexual abuse and I also see a young man that has no idea of how affected and mentally ill he has become. In fact, it has been almost overwhelming -to a point where I currently don't even feel like functioning. Anyhow, in reading some of the recently restored scripts, I ...

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bumpy roads: Do you ever...

http://bumpysroad.blogspot.com/2008/04/do-you-ever.html

Wednesday, April 2, 2008. Do you ever think about killing yourself? Have you ever thought about shooting yourself? But, and this is very real, sometimes (more frequent than I care to accept) I will literally be getting out of bed and just think about shooting myself. It's not just in the morning. Thoughts like these pop up all the time. There appears to be no single pattern of thought or cause. It just happens. The thoughts travel like this:. I have the thought. CSA - Childhood Sexual Abuse. HPD in Me - ...

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bumpy roads: Why did God....

http://bumpysroad.blogspot.com/2008/04/why-did-god.html

Wednesday, April 2, 2008. Why did God allow me to be abused? Why has He allowed my life to be so messed up? What did 'I' do to deserve it? Why am I the one that has to live 41 years (and more to come) years of life with all the bullshit that has happened and all the chaos that it has left? I believe in God. I believe in a lot of stuff that get weird too. But why? Labels: BPD - Borderline Personality Disorder. CSA - Childhood Sexual Abuse. HPD in Me - Histrionic Personality Disorder. Texas, United States.