andstare.blogspot.com

Stand and Stare

Thursday, 20 August 2015. Chapter 21 - Finality. My journey to adoption is over. Hopes and dreams will remain like seeds in the soil, and they will grow one day, but differently. Different dreams. Monday, 10 August 2015. Chapter 20 Tears and triumphs. It was beautiful. We swam, we walked, we talked, we searched for seaglass, we knitted, we played and we baked. Now I am back, and reality kicks in, and my adoption appeal is in just over a week. What will that look like? I don't know, yet. Chapter 19 Longin...

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Stand and Stare | andstare.blogspot.com Reviews

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Thursday, 20 August 2015. Chapter 21 - Finality. My journey to adoption is over. Hopes and dreams will remain like seeds in the soil, and they will grow one day, but differently. Different dreams. Monday, 10 August 2015. Chapter 20 Tears and triumphs. It was beautiful. We swam, we walked, we talked, we searched for seaglass, we knitted, we played and we baked. Now I am back, and reality kicks in, and my adoption appeal is in just over a week. What will that look like? I don't know, yet. Chapter 19 Longin...

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Stand and Stare | andstare.blogspot.com Reviews

https://andstare.blogspot.com

Thursday, 20 August 2015. Chapter 21 - Finality. My journey to adoption is over. Hopes and dreams will remain like seeds in the soil, and they will grow one day, but differently. Different dreams. Monday, 10 August 2015. Chapter 20 Tears and triumphs. It was beautiful. We swam, we walked, we talked, we searched for seaglass, we knitted, we played and we baked. Now I am back, and reality kicks in, and my adoption appeal is in just over a week. What will that look like? I don't know, yet. Chapter 19 Longin...

INTERNAL PAGES

andstare.blogspot.com

1

Stand and Stare: Chapter 18 Letting Go

http://www.andstare.blogspot.com/2015/07/chapter-18-letting-go.html

Monday, 20 July 2015. Chapter 18 Letting Go. I had an image the other day of myself walking in water, my arms outstretched behind me, letting go of all the things that no longer serve me. They were falling from my fingers into the water, one after another, after another, some so quietly they barely made a sound, others almost thrown forcefully away with a venomous energy. I guess there is no time in my life for those things any more. I just don't know what to do with myself. And my dear friends.

2

Stand and Stare: September 2013

http://www.andstare.blogspot.com/2013_09_01_archive.html

Wednesday, 18 September 2013. Can I walk the compassion walk? Last night was spiritual bootcamp, from yoga to compassion class. So from there I cycled, with no lights on, to Rigpa and their compassion course. A counselling classic I read last week advised developing unconditional positive regard for oneself so that you can truly have it for clients. I need some help with this. I realised a few things last night. I don;t think I will ever get there. But I can try. Http:/ www.thehappymovie.com/. I made one...

3

Stand and Stare: February 2014

http://www.andstare.blogspot.com/2014_02_01_archive.html

Saturday, 8 February 2014. Llewyn Davies. An utterably bleak film. Llewyn walks the snowy streets of 60s New York facing disaster after disaster. He loses a cat, he finds another cat, only to run it over. He almost gives up on his singing career. He behaves pretty badly to many people. He rails at his sister for just existing. His life seems full of struggle. I struggled to like him, but couldn't hate him. These fragments I have shored against my ruins.'. The Waste Land and Other Poems.

4

Stand and Stare: Chapter 15 Give Sorrow Words

http://www.andstare.blogspot.com/2015/06/chapter-15-give-sorrow-words.html

Sunday, 28 June 2015. Chapter 15 Give Sorrow Words. A group of about 15 people sit in a room, in a long narrow circle. The room is old, at the top of a brick built London house opposite a secret garden. There are candles, and flowers, and boxes of tissues. Traffic and aeroplanes go by, but the sound of quiet sobbing, of many voices, can still be heard. We are welcomed. Music plays. Heart felt poems are read out, some well known, some written by participants in the ceremony. I feel empty and separate.

5

Stand and Stare: January 2014

http://www.andstare.blogspot.com/2014_01_01_archive.html

Friday, 17 January 2014. Wednesday, 1 January 2014. So, the plan for this year is to give up something for every month, and January's renunciate is television.I have noticed that more and more I 'binge watch' tv, two or three episodes of something at a time and I rarely do anything else in the evenings. This is my first tv free evening, although I actually didn't watch any tv yesterday either. I have no idea. It is uncomfortable. But it feels better than allowing myself to dissolve into a tv series.

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Stand and Stare

Thursday, 20 August 2015. Chapter 21 - Finality. My journey to adoption is over. Hopes and dreams will remain like seeds in the soil, and they will grow one day, but differently. Different dreams. Monday, 10 August 2015. Chapter 20 Tears and triumphs. It was beautiful. We swam, we walked, we talked, we searched for seaglass, we knitted, we played and we baked. Now I am back, and reality kicks in, and my adoption appeal is in just over a week. What will that look like? I don't know, yet. Chapter 19 Longin...

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