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June 30th, 2006. The cat, part 2. I'm feeling catty these days. My folks bought me a cat when I was a kid. One day, after my weekly blood transfusion exercise with him, Cathy lay on my bed much longer than usual and refused to get up for our tightrope walking lesson. I was surprised. He was always a bundle of energy. Did he need an iron pill? Was he in love? Had he found yet another proof to Fermat's last theorem? June 27th, 2006. There was a man who had three eyes. Two spoke English, one spoke Thai.

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b is for... | bernard.livejournal.com Reviews

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June 30th, 2006. The cat, part 2. I'm feeling catty these days. My folks bought me a cat when I was a kid. One day, after my weekly blood transfusion exercise with him, Cathy lay on my bed much longer than usual and refused to get up for our tightrope walking lesson. I was surprised. He was always a bundle of energy. Did he need an iron pill? Was he in love? Had he found yet another proof to Fermat's last theorem? June 27th, 2006. There was a man who had three eyes. Two spoke English, one spoke Thai.

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b is for,seriously loopy,view,blog,history,pals,links,new yorker,woof,tags,fiction,3 comments,leave a comment,three,catwoman,the school,the fly,was she telepathic,the bird,the pen,the tree,the cat,i ate you,a cat,a talking cat,orang samoa pontianak,amused

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b is for... | bernard.livejournal.com Reviews

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June 30th, 2006. The cat, part 2. I'm feeling catty these days. My folks bought me a cat when I was a kid. One day, after my weekly blood transfusion exercise with him, Cathy lay on my bed much longer than usual and refused to get up for our tightrope walking lesson. I was surprised. He was always a bundle of energy. Did he need an iron pill? Was he in love? Had he found yet another proof to Fermat's last theorem? June 27th, 2006. There was a man who had three eyes. Two spoke English, one spoke Thai.

INTERNAL PAGES

bernard.livejournal.com

1

The school - b is for...

http://bernard.livejournal.com/2210.html

I remember my school days growing up. I didn't attend one of those fancy boarding schools that they have nowadays. In my time, staying overnight in school was a privilege reserved for scouts, security guards and homeless people. These days, scouts go hunting in actual mangrove swamps, security guards go home before nightfall, and homeless people are in prison. Will I be pretty? Will I be rich? Will I be President of the United States of America? No, dear. You won't. You're a fish.".

2

Three - b is for...

http://bernard.livejournal.com/2620.html

There was a man who had three eyes. Two spoke English, one spoke Thai. The man's grandmother had three hairs. One smelt like apples, two smelt like pears. The man's own daughter had three ears. Two wept honey, one wept tears. The girl had a friend who had three chins. One had a tail, two had fins. The friend had a brother who had three lips. One had a moustache with hair clips. The brother's classmate had three heads. They argued and slept on different beds. Powered by LiveJournal.com.

3

Catwoman - b is for...

http://bernard.livejournal.com/2432.html

There's a catwoman in every neighbourhood. You know, the one who feeds the cats? I guess there could be worse things than feeding cats. Like elephants. I'm glad the catwoman doesn't feed cannibals either. Can you imagine what she'd be feeding them? Not wild monkeys, for sure. Too hairy. Cannibals are fussy eaters. I know. I watched the Silence of the Lambs. I'm not afraid of getting eaten by cannibals. I'm too thin. Like game hen, except I'm a guy. Did one of her cats get run over by a car?

4

The bird - b is for...

http://bernard.livejournal.com/1604.html

I dreamt that I was a bird. A sparrow. A singing sparrow. Not a talking sparrow or a chirping sparrow. Not a clucking sparrow or a quacking sparrow either. Certainly not a mooing sparrow or a barking sparrow. One day, in my dream (bird time passes a lot more quickly than dream time), I was singing Simon and Garfunkel's "El Condor Pasa". And it struck me - why would I rather be a sparrow than a snail? Snails are cute. They have two antennae above their heads. I think one is for radio, the other is...Does ...

5

The fly - b is for...

http://bernard.livejournal.com/1846.html

I once tried a dish of fruit flies deep-fried in butter. They're four for a dollar, sir," said the lady who was frying them, delicately. No wonder that they're called delicacies. If she even sneezed, she might lose half her day's earnings just like that. I'll take two, please." I wondered whether she caught the flies herself or simply left a piece of fruit out to rot. I imagined her children chasing after flies with swats. Did her ancestors really eat insects? Was it the Nobel or the Macarthur committee?

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b is for...

June 30th, 2006. The cat, part 2. I'm feeling catty these days. My folks bought me a cat when I was a kid. One day, after my weekly blood transfusion exercise with him, Cathy lay on my bed much longer than usual and refused to get up for our tightrope walking lesson. I was surprised. He was always a bundle of energy. Did he need an iron pill? Was he in love? Had he found yet another proof to Fermat's last theorem? June 27th, 2006. There was a man who had three eyes. Two spoke English, one spoke Thai.

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