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chicken scratch and a little re-hash: January 2015
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Chicken scratch and a little re-hash. Thursday, January 22, 2015. A reflection for Nathaniels birthday. And put into a community of rats, they often detox and then do not go back to their addiction. The theory is, then, that humans also do not become addicts when they are in community. My first thought was "well that's not relevant to this situation because Nathaniel had friends and family.". So perhaps the isolation or the feelings of solitude or the feeling that there is no community is self-inflicted&...
christagoesberserk.blogspot.com
chicken scratch and a little re-hash: Learning to forgive...
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Chicken scratch and a little re-hash. Thursday, July 23, 2015. Along the way to restoration is this path. It would be nice if the path was full of reminders of how awesome I am and how much I've been wronged. I mean, that would be way easier, right? Fluff my ego a bit, give me a good dose of self-esteem, make me feel better about being slightly (or more than slightly) miffed at all those who have offended me or ignored me along the way. I kind of feel like God set me up, really. Before I started reading ...
christagoesberserk.blogspot.com
chicken scratch and a little re-hash: Wondering why...
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Chicken scratch and a little re-hash. Monday, July 20, 2015. I think when divorce is as a result of chaos or ill-treatment, it is really easy to push down the heartbreaking aspects and the feelings of betrayal that come when everything is finalized. I think it has been easy for me to set aside the sadness aspect of all of this because it took so long for us to get to the point of divorce. The goodbye took years and I could hardly say I was "in love" by the time the end was real. My word for 2015 is "empt...
christagoesberserk.blogspot.com
chicken scratch and a little re-hash: August 2015
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Chicken scratch and a little re-hash. Sunday, August 30, 2015. Living in God's "yes". What's obnoxious about being human is that I sometimes fail to see when I am living in God's "yes.". For me, these lies are often centered around names I have been called about myself, but, this time, it was about my value in other's eyes. Do others truly see me as valuable? Thankfully that is an area in which I have allowed God's truth to penetrate. I'd gotten to Self-Supplication, something I already struggle with bec...
christagoesberserk.blogspot.com
chicken scratch and a little re-hash: Waiting Right
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Chicken scratch and a little re-hash. Wednesday, July 15, 2015. A couple of weeks ago I was feeling a bit like Veruca Salt from Willy Wonka. I am standing on the precipice of whole bunch of cool stuff. I get to move, I really feel like I have promised that I won't be spending my life single, I get to be a therapist, I get to keep seeing parenting victories, I get a restart! I am super excited about all that God has planned for me and all that He's promised me and I'm ready to get started. I see that I ha...
christagoesberserk.blogspot.com
chicken scratch and a little re-hash: July 2014
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Chicken scratch and a little re-hash. Thursday, July 3, 2014. The importance of a ring. I think it's important to recognize that I was too young to make those choices and that I was stubborn and that I also was not listening to wisdom (basically a recipe for disaster). Not that this is an excuse, but I believe that, for healing purposes, it's important to examine where I went wrong. Finally, a couple years into marriage I had badgered him enough about a ring and I had convinced myself that I needed one&#...
christagoesberserk.blogspot.com
chicken scratch and a little re-hash: July 2015
http://christagoesberserk.blogspot.com/2015_07_01_archive.html
Chicken scratch and a little re-hash. Thursday, July 23, 2015. Along the way to restoration is this path. It would be nice if the path was full of reminders of how awesome I am and how much I've been wronged. I mean, that would be way easier, right? Fluff my ego a bit, give me a good dose of self-esteem, make me feel better about being slightly (or more than slightly) miffed at all those who have offended me or ignored me along the way. I kind of feel like God set me up, really. Before I started reading ...
christagoesberserk.blogspot.com
chicken scratch and a little re-hash: God's best is better...
http://christagoesberserk.blogspot.com/2015/08/god-best-is-better.html
Chicken scratch and a little re-hash. Thursday, August 13, 2015. Gods best is better. So, what does that phrase mean to me? If I am choosing to believe that God's best for me is better than anything I could come up with, then I am released from having to perform a certain way. Believing that God has my best interests in mind frees me to live for Him instead of living for personal fulfillment. When I believe that God's best is better for me, then I am able to live within the promises of who He says I am.
christagoesberserk.blogspot.com
chicken scratch and a little re-hash: November 2014
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Chicken scratch and a little re-hash. Monday, November 24, 2014. I am beginning to understand how circular grief is. Sometimes I think that I've figured it all out- I've found my groove with this loss thing. And then something else happens, sometimes I'm not even sure what it is, and I start to feel things that I have not in a while. Or ever. I have been very very angry about losing Nathaniel recently. I'm not sure I have ever been angrier about anything in my life. It's absolutely not fair. Screw that&#...
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