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Constant in the Darkness

Constant in the Darkness. Sunday, 7 June 2015. I have a weird thing about letting go. Like if I let go of the idea of baby #2 and when that's going to happen for us, it never will. Like being satisfied about my own current life situation will make the next thing I'm hoping for never happen. I know it doesn't make sense, but I feel unable to let the tension related to "when" and "how" just go . just in case by surrendering I'm jinxing myself from the very thing I want so badly from never happening. But us...

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Constant in the Darkness | constantinthedarkness.blogspot.com Reviews
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Constant in the Darkness. Sunday, 7 June 2015. I have a weird thing about letting go. Like if I let go of the idea of baby #2 and when that's going to happen for us, it never will. Like being satisfied about my own current life situation will make the next thing I'm hoping for never happen. I know it doesn't make sense, but I feel unable to let the tension related to when and how just go . just in case by surrendering I'm jinxing myself from the very thing I want so badly from never happening. But us...
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Constant in the Darkness | constantinthedarkness.blogspot.com Reviews

https://constantinthedarkness.blogspot.com

Constant in the Darkness. Sunday, 7 June 2015. I have a weird thing about letting go. Like if I let go of the idea of baby #2 and when that's going to happen for us, it never will. Like being satisfied about my own current life situation will make the next thing I'm hoping for never happen. I know it doesn't make sense, but I feel unable to let the tension related to "when" and "how" just go . just in case by surrendering I'm jinxing myself from the very thing I want so badly from never happening. But us...

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constantinthedarkness.blogspot.com constantinthedarkness.blogspot.com
1

Constant in the Darkness: July 2014

http://www.constantinthedarkness.blogspot.com/2014_07_01_archive.html

Constant in the Darkness. Friday, 18 July 2014. One day at a time. Our paperwork is all in. We're that much closer now to being on the list and putting ourselves out there for another baby. We still have the home study to get through, which should be easier this time around (I think it's only one afternoon this time instead of three home visits like it was the first time). What font size and style? Do I look too forced happy in said pictures? What thickness of paper do I print the copies on? Our checklis...

2

Constant in the Darkness: Still we wait

http://www.constantinthedarkness.blogspot.com/2015/03/still-we-wait.html

Constant in the Darkness. Sunday, 1 March 2015. On the other hand, I think I would be depressed if I'd received zero calls. I know lots of people in this situation and the wait is just as hard for them as it is for me. Maybe harder? As someone pointed out last week, we at least know that our profile hasn't been forgotten. And still we wait. I've been concentrating on distracting myself with home projects and planning Moonbeam's birthday party. But my mind is still somewhere else. 1 March 2015 at 21:04.

3

Constant in the Darkness: March 2014

http://www.constantinthedarkness.blogspot.com/2014_03_01_archive.html

Constant in the Darkness. Saturday, 22 March 2014. My Mom-iversary (a few weeks late! Photo by Karpati Gabor. I've been a mom now for a little over a year. Incredible. After 10 years of wondering, hoping, wishing, it's really here, happening in real time. I just put my little girl to bed, I just cleaned up all of her toys and books, I just recovered a lost soother thrown over the edge of the crib and curddled her back to sleep. I am a mom of a one year old! Subscribe to: Posts (Atom). Dedicated to love a...

4

Constant in the Darkness: December 2014

http://www.constantinthedarkness.blogspot.com/2014_12_01_archive.html

Constant in the Darkness. Sunday, 28 December 2014. How lucky I am to be here now with this particular little girl to call me mama, this particular man to call me his wife. How lucky I really am. Tuesday, 23 December 2014. Still waiting for finally. I know there are people who wait on the list for years. We may very well be in this situation this time around. But I wonder if I'd have an easier time with the wait if I had never received those two calls in the first place. If I'd be more at pea...I try and...

5

Constant in the Darkness: Letting go

http://www.constantinthedarkness.blogspot.com/2015/06/letting-go.html

Constant in the Darkness. Sunday, 7 June 2015. I have a weird thing about letting go. Like if I let go of the idea of baby #2 and when that's going to happen for us, it never will. Like being satisfied about my own current life situation will make the next thing I'm hoping for never happen. I know it doesn't make sense, but I feel unable to let the tension related to "when" and "how" just go . just in case by surrendering I'm jinxing myself from the very thing I want so badly from never happening. Actual...

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penguinsofmine.blogspot.com penguinsofmine.blogspot.com

PENGUINS OF MINE : I will miss you

http://penguinsofmine.blogspot.com/2013/11/i-drew-this-to-i-met-through-stillbirth.html

Drawings on my feelings evoked by infertility and loss. Nov 18, 2013. I will miss you. I drew this to a friend I met through a stillbirth discussion board. Even if we had very similar IF journeys and shared the hardest years, we still had a hard time facing each others pregnancies - she mine before I miscarried, me hers after that. November 19, 2013 at 7:49 PM. November 19, 2013 at 10:33 PM. Thank you Sadie for stopping by again 3. November 22, 2013 at 2:46 AM. Stopping by from ICLW. It is so hard! I hat...

penguinsofmine.blogspot.com penguinsofmine.blogspot.com

PENGUINS OF MINE : The lost

http://penguinsofmine.blogspot.com/2014/02/the-lost.html

Drawings on my feelings evoked by infertility and loss. Feb 20, 2014. Something I drew for my friend for Mother's day - my (embryo) butterflies. I still think of my lost little ones every time I see one. Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). The Empress and the Fool. A Mom of Girls on Election Day. Oh Baby, Baby. Constant in the Darkness. Connecting the Dots of Spiritual Warfare. Eating my words and exiting stage left. Not pregnant and PISSED! Photo by Leif Rosas. Stirrup Queen's List of Blogs. Simple temp...

penguinsofmine.blogspot.com penguinsofmine.blogspot.com

PENGUINS OF MINE : Oh no… It's Christmas!

http://penguinsofmine.blogspot.com/2013/11/christmas.html

Drawings on my feelings evoked by infertility and loss. Nov 26, 2013. Oh no… It's Christmas! This is one of those drawings that are not easy for me to post. I know all the cards we received over the years were not meant to hurt me (even though they did), and I do not mean to hurt back. Still, a lot of hearts are aching at Christmas and I wish more people would understand that. This was and is my way of spreading the word. November 27, 2013 at 12:34 AM. I just love this one! November 27, 2013 at 8:51 PM.

penguinsofmine.blogspot.com penguinsofmine.blogspot.com

PENGUINS OF MINE : December 2013

http://penguinsofmine.blogspot.com/2013_12_01_archive.html

Drawings on my feelings evoked by infertility and loss. Dec 25, 2013. In Finland, 5-7 years is (was at the time) the average waiting time in international adoption, for domestic adoption it is even longer. I would love to know if it is about the same in your country? Dec 19, 2013. Which genius dealt the cards? My infertility journey in a nutshell. Subscribe to: Posts (Atom). Which genius dealt the cards? The Empress and the Fool. A Mom of Girls on Election Day. Oh Baby, Baby. Constant in the Darkness.

growingourpeanut.blogspot.com growingourpeanut.blogspot.com

Growing Peanut: My Little Baby Growing Up

http://growingourpeanut.blogspot.com/2016/01/my-little-baby-growing-up.html

Not expecting to be expecting after 5 years of trying and making other plans. Wednesday, January 20, 2016. My Little Baby Growing Up. And for me as a passive person, who is quite lazy and also takes such a long time to get things done I think it might be a bit harder. I had a lot of adjusting to do. So things like blogging, scrap-booking, reading, combing my hair and brushing my teeth everyday are on the back-burner for now! Jan 23, 2016, 10:08:00 PM. Feb 2, 2016, 11:45:00 PM. My Little Baby Growing Up.

penguinsofmine.blogspot.com penguinsofmine.blogspot.com

PENGUINS OF MINE : November 2013

http://penguinsofmine.blogspot.com/2013_11_01_archive.html

Drawings on my feelings evoked by infertility and loss. Nov 26, 2013. Oh no… It's Christmas! This is one of those drawings that are not easy for me to post. I know all the cards we received over the years were not meant to hurt me (even though they did), and I do not mean to hurt back. Still, a lot of hearts are aching at Christmas and I wish more people would understand that. This was and is my way of spreading the word. Nov 18, 2013. I will miss you. Nov 6, 2013. The chicken or the egg? I will miss you.

penguinsofmine.blogspot.com penguinsofmine.blogspot.com

PENGUINS OF MINE : September 2013

http://penguinsofmine.blogspot.com/2013_09_01_archive.html

Drawings on my feelings evoked by infertility and loss. Sep 24, 2013. After all your comments on my last post (thank you for each and every one of them! I know for sure: the theme of this drawing is not unfamiliar to you. Must give a sarcasm warning though! Sep 20, 2013. The September ICLW eve, my second time around - welcome to my blog! This post is drawn from my dear friend's IF journey. What is the most irrational fertility advice you have ever gotten? Sep 14, 2013. A defense mechanism at work. Discov...

growingourpeanut.blogspot.com growingourpeanut.blogspot.com

Growing Peanut: March 2014

http://growingourpeanut.blogspot.com/2014_03_01_archive.html

Not expecting to be expecting after 5 years of trying and making other plans. Monday, March 17, 2014. Nursery - curtains arrived! The room is very cozy and dark when the curtains are drawn and unfortunately does not create a great photograph, but this should give you an idea. The close-up of the picture is a truer reflection of the colour. Wednesday, March 12, 2014. Nursery - tiling done and dusted. But, 3 days later and the tiling is done. Here is a pic of Peanut's room:. Monday, March 03, 2014. On Frid...

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Constant in the Darkness

Constant in the Darkness. Sunday, 7 June 2015. I have a weird thing about letting go. Like if I let go of the idea of baby #2 and when that's going to happen for us, it never will. Like being satisfied about my own current life situation will make the next thing I'm hoping for never happen. I know it doesn't make sense, but I feel unable to let the tension related to "when" and "how" just go . just in case by surrendering I'm jinxing myself from the very thing I want so badly from never happening. But us...

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