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Portland Is The New Andy: July 2005

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Portland Is The New Andy. What the hell do you know about it? Wednesday, July 27, 2005. I am the night. I watch over the city and cringe in disgust. Either disgust or abdominal pain, you see, I'm lactose intolerant and I just had a Mochachino from that fancy coffee shop around the corner- A crimefighter needs a good kick to start off his night of justice). So, where was I. Oh yes. Kathy the Transvestite Prostitue Clown". Mayonnaise and shoe.". I scream into the night. I should have brought a jacket tonig...

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Portland Is The New Andy: August 2005

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Portland Is The New Andy. What the hell do you know about it? Tuesday, August 23, 2005. The return of the good doctor F. Doctor Farvo's laboratory was quite a lucrative base of operations after the fuel embargo of the 1980's had been lifted. The new trade laws and cheap export taxes had blown a hole to escape the financial woes of the previous years that was only rivaled by Moses parting the Red Sea. The high stress industry of transporting illegal drugs was brought to an all time high through an interes...

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Portland Is The New Andy: August 2006

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Portland Is The New Andy. What the hell do you know about it? Friday, August 11, 2006. On with the show:. My mind runs through random train wrecked thoughts at any given point of the day about any given amount of subjects and more than half of the time, they don't have a thing to do with solving the problems of the world. My self-appointed day job). Example: There was a film critic that watched my last little acting gig and likened the character to a. Brad Pitt type of smart-alec charisma.". Even though ...

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Portland Is The New Andy: July 2006

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Portland Is The New Andy. What the hell do you know about it? Friday, July 07, 2006. On The Road: The Search for an acting Job. Jack Kerouac spoke to me, when I needed this common ground more than I needed to throw crumpled dollar bills on the sticky bar top. I needed guidance. I needed something other than dying on the cross of my own dastardly sins. only to be reborn in the devilish delights of lady night. How much longer could I keep this up? Posted by Bevan Bell @ 2:19 PM. Film Auteur and kung-fu pro...

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Portland Is The New Andy: September 2005

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Portland Is The New Andy. What the hell do you know about it? Monday, September 12, 2005. Which remake was it again? Here it is folks! Posted by Bevan Bell @ 6:33 PM. Friday, September 09, 2005. They tossed the black one back. These things just keep getting better and better. I think that Malkoff has something to do with them. Posted by Bevan Bell @ 11:13 AM. Wednesday, September 07, 2005. I wish I gave enough of a shit about politics to think of something like this. Posted by Bevan Bell @ 4:04 PM.

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Portland Is The New Andy: October 2006

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Portland Is The New Andy. What the hell do you know about it? Wednesday, October 18, 2006. Bring on the Rampage of Foliage Death! All Hallows Eve. I love Halloween. The crisp fall air that tweaks the nipples just enough to feel comfortably erotic. the warm crawling burn that peels off the back of your throat after a shot of bourbon. hiding in bushes with a tazer gun. The fall is simply an enjoyable time of year. Then again, I could be this guy. and never hope to get laid as long as he shall live.

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Portland Is The New Andy: April 2006

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Portland Is The New Andy. What the hell do you know about it? Thursday, April 27, 2006. The First PORTLANDISTHENEWANDY Drink Review. A NOTE FROM THE EDITOR:. Many never thought that "PortlandIsTheNewAndy" would sink to such lows as to mill through the random idiocy of what has come to be knows as "drink reviews." Look at it this way: If you are to stumble across this page on some random Wednesday afternoon after clicking through the porn links and. CRUZAN ESTATE DARK RUM. Used with fruity cock-swill drin...

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Portland Is The New Andy: November 2005

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Portland Is The New Andy. What the hell do you know about it? Monday, November 28, 2005. Is Mel Gibson being charged for war crimes? Posted by Bevan Bell @ 6:14 PM. Tuesday, November 22, 2005. Drunky McDrunkard, France's last great hope. Though it didn't reach the European markets until the following year. and Chuck Norris took Paris with "Invasion U.S.A. and a thick hand slapping the key French city around like the drunken wench it is). The townsfolk were frightened to the point of pissing on themselves.

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Portland Is The New Andy: December 2005

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Portland Is The New Andy. What the hell do you know about it? Wednesday, December 28, 2005. The third multi-annual parade of pictures taken from random blogs. Jesus climbed to the top of the mountain and looked down upon the land. He thought to himself,. This will be the coolest bass jump ever. Of course, it has to be. for I am the lord and no previous jump from any point shall reach anywhere near the point of being as cool as this jump. I have spoken and it will be so.". It was time for his third coming.