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Rae's of Hope

Tuesday, August 6, 2013. I think somewhere between writing my last post and getting up out of my chair I realized that "choosing joy" was just kind of bullshit and not really gonna happen for a while. Maybe bullshit was the wrong word choice. I think "long shot" is a better description. Ive reached out for help, but returning the phone calls is just too much work at this point. My response was simple. I had no choice. Actually, I had two choices. I either kill myself or I survive it. And ...And now, I fe...

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Rae's of Hope | ellistonrae.blogspot.com Reviews
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Tuesday, August 6, 2013. I think somewhere between writing my last post and getting up out of my chair I realized that choosing joy was just kind of bullshit and not really gonna happen for a while. Maybe bullshit was the wrong word choice. I think long shot is a better description. Ive reached out for help, but returning the phone calls is just too much work at this point. My response was simple. I had no choice. Actually, I had two choices. I either kill myself or I survive it. And ...And now, I fe...
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Rae's of Hope | ellistonrae.blogspot.com Reviews

https://ellistonrae.blogspot.com

Tuesday, August 6, 2013. I think somewhere between writing my last post and getting up out of my chair I realized that "choosing joy" was just kind of bullshit and not really gonna happen for a while. Maybe bullshit was the wrong word choice. I think "long shot" is a better description. Ive reached out for help, but returning the phone calls is just too much work at this point. My response was simple. I had no choice. Actually, I had two choices. I either kill myself or I survive it. And ...And now, I fe...

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1

Rae's of Hope: JOY

http://www.ellistonrae.blogspot.com/2013/06/joy.html

Tuesday, June 4, 2013. Ive been reading lately about Joy. The difference between happiness and joy. And how possible it is to experience grief and joy at the same time…. If you choose to. It has been a BATTLE lately, to keep myself from feeling entitled. Sometimes I feel entitled to be in a bad mood. Not just sad, but a terrible, mean mood. I have felt entitled to my doctor’s attention. Heaven forbid 5 minutes pass without my question being answered. And now, I feel entitled to having a baby. When everyt...

2

Rae's of Hope: December 2012

http://www.ellistonrae.blogspot.com/2012_12_01_archive.html

Monday, December 31, 2012. Thursday, December 20, 2012. When you lose a baby. You don’t know what to expect. People surround you. For a couple of weeks. Making sure you are not going to kill yourself, refuse to get out of bed, or start rocking a baby doll like the crazy lady they heard about from a friend. You get lots of sympathy cards, clearly written and designed to be sent to console a daughter losing her father. Not the other way around. And free baby magazines. And free baby coupons. You know, or y...

3

Rae's of Hope

http://www.ellistonrae.blogspot.com/2013/02/yep-im-still-alive.html

Tuesday, February 12, 2013. Yep, I'm still alive. Still breathing. Still processing. Still hurting. Still missing. Still loving. Still crying. Still anxious. Still scared. Still stressed. Still proud. Still. February 25, 2013 at 8:10 AM. Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). Yep, Im still alive. Still breathing. Still proce. View my complete profile. Picture Window template. Template images by merrymoonmary.

4

Rae's of Hope: You have to endure it.

http://www.ellistonrae.blogspot.com/2013/01/you-have-to-endure-it.html

Sunday, January 13, 2013. You have to endure it. A blog that I follow. Referenced an excerpt from an advice columnist name Sugar. Someone had written to Sugar about the stillbirth of their daughter. I have read this excerpt everyday since she posted it. It puts into words what I cant, and has given me hope that I havent yet felt. Here's just some of it. Though we live in a time and place and culture that tries to tell us otherwise, suffering is what happens when truly horrible things happen to us. Hang i...

5

Rae's of Hope: August 2013

http://www.ellistonrae.blogspot.com/2013_08_01_archive.html

Tuesday, August 6, 2013. I think somewhere between writing my last post and getting up out of my chair I realized that "choosing joy" was just kind of bullshit and not really gonna happen for a while. Maybe bullshit was the wrong word choice. I think "long shot" is a better description. Ive reached out for help, but returning the phone calls is just too much work at this point. My response was simple. I had no choice. Actually, I had two choices. I either kill myself or I survive it. And ...

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my life, rarely chronicled: December 2010

http://philopaideia.blogspot.com/2010_12_01_archive.html

My life, rarely chronicled. Friday, December 31, 2010. So long, 2010! Still, i have high hopes that 2011 is going to be a fabulous year with graduation in May, TCG's wedding in June, my parents' 30th annivesary (also in June), starting a new job as a Nurse Practitioner! In the meantime, i will be taking this journey one day at a time. View my complete profile. So long, 2010! Sites and Blogs I Follow. The Cunningham Family Blog. Clairemargit - It's all good. OwensNafrica Journey to Africa.

philopaideia.blogspot.com philopaideia.blogspot.com

my life, rarely chronicled: August 2011

http://philopaideia.blogspot.com/2011_08_01_archive.html

My life, rarely chronicled. Sunday, August 14, 2011. Back to the basics. I'm a huge sucker for 2 kinds of books (well, lots of kinds, but for story's sake, here we go): 1) old-school children's books, and 2) historical novels. Now, NOT the icky romance for $2 historical novels. But right now I'm reading Francine Rivers' Sons of Encouragement. It's actually 5 short books about men of the Bible. They're definitely historically-based, but the author has added fictional details that may. Back to the basics.

philopaideia.blogspot.com philopaideia.blogspot.com

my life, rarely chronicled: December 2011

http://philopaideia.blogspot.com/2011_12_01_archive.html

My life, rarely chronicled. Saturday, December 3, 2011. I took a day off this week. it was thursday, december 1st. john and i were thinking about going to chicago for the day, but we weren't in the mood. so instead we stayed home, spent time together and with the doggies, bought a real christmas tree, and decorated it and the house in the afternoon. we had a blast. what a great beginning to christmastime 2011. View my complete profile. Sites and Blogs I Follow. The Cunningham Family Blog.

philopaideia.blogspot.com philopaideia.blogspot.com

my life, rarely chronicled: week eight. spring, is that you?

http://philopaideia.blogspot.com/2012/03/week-eight-spring-is-that-you.html

My life, rarely chronicled. Sunday, March 11, 2012. Week eight. spring, is that you? What to say about this week.hmm, dunno. Except that it started with snow and ended with sun. Today we walked the dogs with my 'rents, raked the front yard and picked up sticks and leaves, took down the Christmas lights, talked about possibly expanding the garage, and grilled out for dinner. it was a lovely springy day. Here's hoping the snow stays away for good. i'm ready for spring and green! View my complete profile.

philopaideia.blogspot.com philopaideia.blogspot.com

my life, rarely chronicled: March 2011

http://philopaideia.blogspot.com/2011_03_01_archive.html

My life, rarely chronicled. Monday, March 28, 2011. 38 days. and an interview? 38 days til the whole thing is over on may 6th. crazy. i have a lot to get done before then. phew. i can do this. Have a sort've interview today. already accepted another position, so this is a strange circumstance i'm in. lead me on, jesus. what's best? That's what i want. Wednesday, March 16, 2011. It is what it is. I wish i weren't so drained. but it is what it is. It is what it is. View my complete profile. It is what it is.

philopaideia.blogspot.com philopaideia.blogspot.com

my life, rarely chronicled: March 2013

http://philopaideia.blogspot.com/2013_03_01_archive.html

My life, rarely chronicled. Sunday, March 31, 2013. This is the best day. also. it has been more than a year since i posted anything. ridiculous. View my complete profile. Sites and Blogs I Follow. The Cunningham Family Blog. Clairemargit - It's all good. OwensNafrica Journey to Africa. The Choices We Make and the Chances We Take. View From an Irish Back Yard. Travels through my mind and world. Living Is A Process. Amy and aaron woolsey. To South Africa and Back. Musings: reverie as my reality.

philopaideia.blogspot.com philopaideia.blogspot.com

my life, rarely chronicled: November 2011

http://philopaideia.blogspot.com/2011_11_01_archive.html

My life, rarely chronicled. Tuesday, November 15, 2011. Last year in my 20s. Wow 29. i remember when i thought 25 would be a long way off. It's been a great day, though. My boss is out of town, so we didn't have to be in the OR this morning for surgery. So i took the day off. and it's been awesome to relax at home with my favorite person (and favorite dogs). A hilarious card with a heartfelt message (the best combo, in my opinion), and presents (thanks, J! All in all, a great day. View my complete profile.

philopaideia.blogspot.com philopaideia.blogspot.com

my life, rarely chronicled: October 2011

http://philopaideia.blogspot.com/2011_10_01_archive.html

My life, rarely chronicled. Sunday, October 23, 2011. There are days i feel my heart is full, and all is well with the world. And then there are days when i feel like celia foote from the help. Who couldn't buy herself a friend if she wanted. Maybe i'm bored. maybe disappointed? Definitely in need of some perspective. and purpose. and joy. View my complete profile. Sites and Blogs I Follow. The Cunningham Family Blog. Clairemargit - It's all good. OwensNafrica Journey to Africa. Living Is A Process.

philopaideia.blogspot.com philopaideia.blogspot.com

my life, rarely chronicled: week four: so so.

http://philopaideia.blogspot.com/2012/02/week-four-so-so.html

My life, rarely chronicled. Sunday, February 12, 2012. Week four: so so. Week four was tough. i just was so tired. at the beginning of the week, i had no motivation. by the end of the week, though, i figured i better kick it in gear. i ended up going 4/7 days. i'm ok with it. So first week= 4/7. So that would be 13/28. that third week really killed my average. man. that is rough. must.do.better. View my complete profile. Week five: didnt happen either. Week five. a challenge. Week four: so so.

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Rae's of Hope

Tuesday, August 6, 2013. I think somewhere between writing my last post and getting up out of my chair I realized that "choosing joy" was just kind of bullshit and not really gonna happen for a while. Maybe bullshit was the wrong word choice. I think "long shot" is a better description. Ive reached out for help, but returning the phone calls is just too much work at this point. My response was simple. I had no choice. Actually, I had two choices. I either kill myself or I survive it. And ...And now, I fe...

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