FLUXTUXWUX.BLOGSPOT.COM

consumernaut.blogspot.com

Moderately Useful Consumernaut: October 2016

http://consumernaut.blogspot.com/2016_10_01_archive.html

The Internet is a wonderful place, my friends. Friday, October 14, 2016. As though I NEEDED another reason to drink beer. Beer is proof that god loves us, and wants us to be happy.". Benjamin Franklin (or Homer Simpson, I'm not really sure). Ignore for a minute all the things that beer is not good for: weight loss, relationship decisions, general hydration, blood sugar maintenance, dancing white dudes, etc. Let's talk about the things that beer IS good for! Gastrointestinal Health: beer aids in digestion!

consumernaut.blogspot.com

Moderately Useful Consumernaut: Learn some stuff, ya turkey!

http://consumernaut.blogspot.com/2016/08/so-internet-has-recently-crapped-its.html

The Internet is a wonderful place, my friends. Tuesday, August 23, 2016. Learn some stuff, ya turkey! So, the Internet has recently crapped its collective self over a video of a guy. Filling a pool with Orbeez. And explaining the science behind why you don't sink to the bottom. (I guess spending the 1980s terrified of quicksand was all for naught.). Speaking as a woman who has had the experience of diving into a pool of fake jello ( floral gel crystals. 1 This guy absolutely hates his wife. Download Game...

consumernaut.blogspot.com

Moderately Useful Consumernaut: November 2016

http://consumernaut.blogspot.com/2016_11_01_archive.html

The Internet is a wonderful place, my friends. Friday, November 4, 2016. Why "Trump" your lady friends when you can just turn on the lights? Just a few days left before this election nonsense is over. I find both candidates reprehensible, but in the usual style of American politics, will be voting for the lesser of two extraordinary evils. Yaaaay. So, why not just embrace your inner dickhead and drop a load of dollars on this lamp? Subscribe to: Posts (Atom). View my complete profile.

consumernaut.blogspot.com

Moderately Useful Consumernaut: February 2012

http://consumernaut.blogspot.com/2012_02_01_archive.html

The Internet is a wonderful place, my friends. Wednesday, February 22, 2012. And Americans wonder why we're the fattest nation on Earth. New in the world of "fast food we don't EVER need to consume:" The Doritos Taco at Taco Bell. The yellow corn tortilla shell is replaced by a Doritos flavored crunchy thing that will inevitably kill you and cause some needless, class-action law suit ("I didn't know it was going to make me fat! Tramps and Dinos - kinda NSFW. No, really. I don't know who Don Glut. It take...

consumernaut.blogspot.com

Moderately Useful Consumernaut: July 2012

http://consumernaut.blogspot.com/2012_07_01_archive.html

The Internet is a wonderful place, my friends. Monday, July 30, 2012. Word of the day: Anthropomorphic. Pee Wee Herman would be proud. Purveyors of fine life tools like absinthe floss. Now bring you the greatest accessory you will ever need. Nothing injects levity into a situation like sticking googly eyes on your favorite inanimate object. A stapler, a can of soda, a pack of smokes - the possibilities are endless! For a one time payment of $7.02, you can get giant googly. Tuesday, July 17, 2012. Would h...

consumernaut.blogspot.com

Moderately Useful Consumernaut: Why "Trump" your lady friends when you can just turn on the lights?

http://consumernaut.blogspot.com/2016/11/why-trump-your-lady-friends-when-you.html

The Internet is a wonderful place, my friends. Friday, November 4, 2016. Why "Trump" your lady friends when you can just turn on the lights? Just a few days left before this election nonsense is over. I find both candidates reprehensible, but in the usual style of American politics, will be voting for the lesser of two extraordinary evils. Yaaaay. So, why not just embrace your inner dickhead and drop a load of dollars on this lamp? Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). View my complete profile.

consumernaut.blogspot.com

Moderately Useful Consumernaut: How to improve your food, in 3 easy steps

http://consumernaut.blogspot.com/2016/08/how-to-improve-your-food-in-3-easy-steps.html

The Internet is a wonderful place, my friends. Monday, August 22, 2016. How to improve your food, in 3 easy steps. Having lived in the South for almost the last 10 years, I have learned some very important truths about food consumption. Most important being: Yankees are doing it wrong. Y'all. If it is edible, it is better deep-fried. The addition of bacon. To whatever you're consuming makes it at least 25x better. Food on a stick is food not on a stick. In that spirit, please let me introduce: The Rollie.

consumernaut.blogspot.com

Moderately Useful Consumernaut: May 2012

http://consumernaut.blogspot.com/2012_05_01_archive.html

The Internet is a wonderful place, my friends. Tuesday, May 8, 2012. The most underrated hat EVER. Hands down - it's the fez. Why aren't these things more popular? Only monkeys and Middle-Eastern guy stereotypes in movies wear them. They're comfy and stylish. We need to get a fez on Jessica Simpson's giant baby. I need a Cthulhu fez. In my life.for serious. Hear that dull thud? That's Thoreau rolling in his grave. And understand himself - build a cabin, fish, reflect, etc. Living deliberately. Just shy o...

consumernaut.blogspot.com

Moderately Useful Consumernaut: December 2011

http://consumernaut.blogspot.com/2011_12_01_archive.html

The Internet is a wonderful place, my friends. Wednesday, December 21, 2011. I've been watching Dr. Who. While I'm not as up on current Doctors as I should be, I'm still a fan. Brilliant speculation about the future, c.ompelling plot lines, sexual tension, SCIENCE! And time travel How can you not be intrigued? For you nubes out there, here's an expertly diagrammed history of the best Doctor in the business. Hit this link. For a better image. Not a big cat person. But, damn, this. Will be happy to oblige.

consumernaut.blogspot.com

Moderately Useful Consumernaut: January 2012

http://consumernaut.blogspot.com/2012_01_01_archive.html

The Internet is a wonderful place, my friends. Wednesday, January 11, 2012. Paula Deen better watch her ass. The butt (haha) of many jokes about excessive butter use, Paula Deen. Has a reputation for ignoring calories in favor of authentic flavor. Her Tunica. Buffet features various side items swimming in butter, and just about everything you can conceivably deep fry. But ol' girl has some competition. Meet the boys of " Epic Meal Time. But buy a gym membership after watching. Tuesday, January 10, 2012.