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穎蝶

From the inside out, these are my layers: bad, good, bad, good and now- new - bad again. They attach beneath my skin, nested one inside the other like Matryoshka dolls, anchored with a pin through each skull at the top. They ring like a bell, scream and peal, complain, when layers and outsides clash. Beneath the layers, there is nothing: unbounded emptiness like the equation of the universe inverted so that one equals zero.

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穎蝶 | fly-ying.blogspot.com Reviews
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From the inside out, these are my layers: bad, good, bad, good and now- new - bad again. They attach beneath my skin, nested one inside the other like Matryoshka dolls, anchored with a pin through each skull at the top. They ring like a bell, scream and peal, complain, when layers and outsides clash. Beneath the layers, there is nothing: unbounded emptiness like the equation of the universe inverted so that one equals zero.
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1 burnt
2 posted by
3 no comments
4 i lost
5 i have lost
6 survive what
7 arghghghghhhhhhhhhhhhh
8 my own demons
9 my insanity
10 are they real
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burnt,posted by,no comments,i lost,i have lost,survive what,arghghghghhhhhhhhhhhhh,my own demons,my insanity,are they real,or exaggerated,grief,value,older posts,about me,quotes,books,blog archive,october,inspiration,swissmiss,the inspiration room,clips
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穎蝶 | fly-ying.blogspot.com Reviews

https://fly-ying.blogspot.com

From the inside out, these are my layers: bad, good, bad, good and now- new - bad again. They attach beneath my skin, nested one inside the other like Matryoshka dolls, anchored with a pin through each skull at the top. They ring like a bell, scream and peal, complain, when layers and outsides clash. Beneath the layers, there is nothing: unbounded emptiness like the equation of the universe inverted so that one equals zero.

INTERNAL PAGES

fly-ying.blogspot.com fly-ying.blogspot.com
1

穎蝶: April 2009

http://fly-ying.blogspot.com/2009_04_01_archive.html

Tuesday, April 28, 2009. As for the closeness we feel toward our friends, this is usually more like attachment than compassion. Genuine compassion should be unbiased. If we only feel close to our friends, and not to our enemies, or to the countless people who are unknown to us personally and toward whom we are indifferent, then our compassion is only partial or biased. His Holiness, the Dalai Lama. Wednesday, April 8, 2009. Mad World, Gary Jules. All around me are familiar faces. No tomorrow, no tomorrow.

2

穎蝶: burnt

http://fly-ying.blogspot.com/2013/12/burnt.html

Saturday, December 7, 2013. I want to give up. but i have nothing left to give up. 2 years i've invested in it. 2 years i've lied to everyone, duped myself, and burned my soul. Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). View my complete profile. I have more care to stay than will to go." -W. Shakespeare. Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in the memory as the wish to forget it." - Michel de Montaigne. Sometimes a cigar, is just a cigar." - Sigmund Freud. We lie the loudest when we lie to ourselves. - Unknown.

3

穎蝶: you cannot lose what you never had

http://fly-ying.blogspot.com/2012/07/you-cannot-lose-what-you-never-had.html

Monday, July 2, 2012. You cannot lose what you never had. What did i never have? Then why do i feel this loss? Why can't i bear to leave? Why can't i walk away from this pain? Why do i keep on torturing myself? What is it that keeps me trapped? My love of self-inflicted pain? Why do the tears come only when i drink? Why do these feelings only surface when i am intoxicated? Why can't i deal with hurt? Why does it kill me every time? What do i want? Who should i be? Who do i need to be? Who can i be? The I...

4

穎蝶: August 2011

http://fly-ying.blogspot.com/2011_08_01_archive.html

Thursday, August 18, 2011. An End and a beginning? A phase of my life has come to an end. So another has just started? It's interesting how I didn't notice the transition. Physically there's been a change. But emotionally not so. Perhaps this is so new that I can't comprehend the difference? Am I subconsciously blocking and denying something. or perhaps, there isn't even anything. Maybe there isn't anything inside of me as well. so opening up this chapter, it's natural to draw a blank. Let go of it?

5

穎蝶: January 2012

http://fly-ying.blogspot.com/2012_01_01_archive.html

Monday, January 30, 2012. Joining the spiritual path. Joining the spiritual path. By Paulo Coelho on January 27, 2012. Many emotions move the human heart when it decides to dedicate itself to the spiritual path. This may be a “noble” reason – like faith, love of our neighbor, or charity. Or it may be just a whim, the fear of loneliness, curiosity, or the fear of death. God uses loneliness to teach us about living together. Sometimes he uses anger so that we can understand the infinite value of peace.

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bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com

BS: The vikings are back!

http://bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com/2008/01/vikings-are-back.html

Onsdag 2. januar 2008. The vikings are back! New movement in Norway. The vikings are back! Through the last years there has been a growing interest for the old vikings. Everything is coming back, bit by bit, brought by committed people who are eager to learn from the ancestors. They try to make everything authentic: The houses, the vessels, clothes, jewellry, tools, handcraft, food and beverage, not to mention the viking weapons and games, ceremonies and rituals. Enough love for us all:). Hardly see you ...

bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com

BS: Killer Whale

http://bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com/2008/02/killer-whale.html

Fredag 15. februar 2008. I found the perfect way of exercising for me. Swimming! I can keep up and I can compete. A wonderful thing that I don't have to carry my own body weight. Me and one of my friends have been swimming twice a week lately and yesterday we swam 1,5 kilometres! I think we are allowed to be proud of ourselves. Thank God we have a indoor heated swimmingpool in the nearest town. Or else we would have to break through the ice to get to the water. Not stuffed and heavy. Legg inn en kommentar.

bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com

BS: Time Travel

http://bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com/2007/11/time-travel.html

Torsdag 29. november 2007. It has been a dream for human beings "through all times". How can we travel in time? But I wonder. How can we NOT? Because we have left the harbour and are sailing down the stream of time, second by second. I would not wish to travel faster at all. I study the views on the banks of the world as I float by. I wawe and smile to others and invite some of them on board. We enjoy each others company. Some stay and others go. 30 november 2007 kl. 04.01. Legg inn en kommentar.

bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com

BS: With closed eyes

http://bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com/2008/03/with-closed-eyes.html

Fredag 14. mars 2008. When I close my eyes. I feel your anxiety. I feel your longing. And the fear of comforting. We are two in loneliness. Hello This post is likeable, and your blog is very interesting, congratulations :-). I will add in my blogroll =). If ossible gives a last there on my blog, it is about the Aparelho de DVD. I hope you enjoy. The address is http:/ aparelho-dvd.blogspot.com. A hug. 5 april 2008 kl. 01.15. 15 mars 2010 kl. 14.14. Legg inn en kommentar. For the Love of Woman.

bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com

BS: The Devil in Me

http://bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com/2008/02/devil-in-me.html

Lørdag 16. februar 2008. The Devil in Me. You love my halo and you love my wings. You love me for all of those sweet little things. But you have to know that I also do fail. If you really like me - love also my tail. If you really love me - then see my obsession. If you really want me - accept my posession. Your blood and your heart is what I want to eat. You have the force that I need to defeat. So please, come on in, let us have a fresh start. For twenty-five minutes- till death do us part.

bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com

BS: My name is independence

http://bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com/2007/12/my-name-is-independence.html

Lørdag 1. desember 2007. My name is independence. Thank you Azrael for the idea for this post.). I always had cats. I got my first one when I was four, at the same time I got a baby brother - - so I had something to be busy with, and I WAS busy. poor Martin was dressed up in babys clothes and carried around, always patient. Marley on the picture says: "Put that stupid camera away and cuddle me! Looks very mischevious, naughty and playful.:-). 2 desember 2007 kl. 05.24. Your welcome Nadiyya :D. Ld, he IS!

bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com

BS: 9 to 5

http://bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com/2008/02/9-to-5.html

Torsdag 7. februar 2008. New job. Four days a week, at a eatery. Cooking, waiting, cleaning, dishes, aaaaaahh! It is a typical sagittarius thing - we totally deal with a routine job, we'll do ANYTHING, as long as it finances our next great idea, in my case establishing a small travel company and arrange trips to Egypt. Everything in the Land of The Sun is ready. What takes time, and costs money, is the paperwork in Norway. And - still a sagittarius girl - I hate that! There are all kinds of people and pr...

bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com

BS: Something new for the new year

http://bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com/2008/01/something-new-for-new-year.html

Tirsdag 1. januar 2008. Something new for the new year. I have stopped making New Years resolutions a long time ago - - it is just not my thing I guess, I am already working out, already dieting and already environmentally concious. So this new year I have decided to , instead of changing habits, learning something new. Topic for the next six months? I have bought the books already and have read some during christmas, soon I am ready to draw my first horoscope - my own of course. Happy new year to all!

bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com

BS: And I still miss someone...

http://bedouin-staircase.blogspot.com/2008/04/and-i-still-miss-someone.html

Søndag 27. april 2008. And I still miss someone. You may have wondered where I've been. I have been inside. Inside me . I have discovered my own core in order to maintain balance. If one wants balance, he or she can not be dependent of anyone. You can share on others but not lean on them - - Trust is wonderful. The first one to trust is oneself. This is why I am letting go. I need other people to find their own balance, and I need to stand firmly grounded on my own two feet and in my own energy.

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穎蝶

Saturday, December 7, 2013. I want to give up. but i have nothing left to give up. 2 years i've invested in it. 2 years i've lied to everyone, duped myself, and burned my soul. Saturday, July 7, 2012. I have lost myself, my heart, my soul and who I am. I have lost my strength and my motivation. I have lost my confidence and my path. I have lost my health and my mind. I have lost my love and my emotions. I have lost my smiles and my tears. I REALLY DON'T WANT TO GO BACK TO REALITY. Friday, July 6, 2012.

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