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How Not to Self-Publish - The Totally Splendid Hotshot Author's Survival Guide

Penned using Rosen's own blunders interspersed with wry observations, How Not to Self-Publish provides a light-hearted look at selling books.

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How Not to Self-Publish - The Totally Splendid Hotshot Author's Survival Guide | how-not-to-self-publish.co.uk Reviews
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Penned using Rosen's own blunders interspersed with wry observations, How Not to Self-Publish provides a light-hearted look at selling books.
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How Not to Self-Publish - The Totally Splendid Hotshot Author's Survival Guide | how-not-to-self-publish.co.uk Reviews

https://how-not-to-self-publish.co.uk

Penned using Rosen's own blunders interspersed with wry observations, How Not to Self-Publish provides a light-hearted look at selling books.

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1

How Not to Self-Publish - The Totally Splendid Hotshot Author's Survival Guide: October 2014

http://www.how-not-to-self-publish.co.uk/2014_10_01_archive.html

Friday, 31 October 2014. A Reviewer Misunderstands Your Ironic Self-Help Book. Signs of a problem. Rating drops; critical review count increases. You’ve written an ironic self-publishing guide, because, let’s face it, you’re a pretty big deal now that you’ve had some badges featuring your cover specially printed. You know it won’t be everybody’s cup of tea, but you’re okay with that. Then it happens: the one-star review. Suddenly, you’re not ‘okay with that’. Thursday, 30 October 2014. Signs of a problem.

2

You’re Assassinated Mid-Series | How Not to Self-Publish - The Totally Splendid Hotshot Author's Survival Guide

http://www.how-not-to-self-publish.co.uk/2014/11/youre-assassinated-mid-series.html

Saturday, 1 November 2014. You’re Assassinated Mid-Series. Signs of a problem. Breath absent; skin cold to touch. Feeling pretty darn cheesed off. Your friends warned you about the dangers of tackling stalkers, cocaine addicts and critical reviews but would you listen? As a result of your pig-headedness, you are now dead – assassinated by Shit-Hot Rod. Ah, your flatulent giant series. You re-create it in your mind – giants bottom burping whilst up ladders, giants bottom burping whilst up beanst...In the ...

3

How Not to Self-Publish - The Totally Splendid Hotshot Author's Survival Guide: September 2014

http://www.how-not-to-self-publish.co.uk/2014_09_01_archive.html

Tuesday, 30 September 2014. Another Author Is Disgracing the Name of Indie. Signs of a problem. Somebody else’s self-published book is very, very, very, very bad. Irritation; superiority; sense of moral responsibility. A new novel catches your interest and you download a copy. However, the very first word contains a typo. You read on – the second sentence makes no sense. You turn the page – chapter 2 is missing. Stop and think about the situation carefully. How bad is the book really? Note: whilst the po...

4

A Fellow Writer Offers You Cocaine | How Not to Self-Publish - The Totally Splendid Hotshot Author's Survival Guide

http://www.how-not-to-self-publish.co.uk/2014/10/a-fellow-writer-offers-you-cocaine.html

Monday, 27 October 2014. A Fellow Writer Offers You Cocaine. Signs of a problem. Fellow writer sniffs a lot and then invites you into a toilet. You’re at a book fair at the local library, when a seemingly straight-laced writer of historical fiction pulls you into the disabled toilets and offers you a line of coke. At first, in your naivety, you think the white powder might be some tasty lemon sherbet, but when your fellow author leads by example, the penny drops. Also, depending on how much respect you h...

5

Your Talentless Mate Demands a Part in the Film Adaptation of Your Novel | How Not to Self-Publish - The Totally Splendid Hotshot Author's Survival Guide

http://www.how-not-to-self-publish.co.uk/2014/10/your-talentless-mate-demands-part-in.html

Tuesday, 28 October 2014. Your Talentless Mate Demands a Part in the Film Adaptation of Your Novel. Signs of a problem. Mate buys you many drinks; mate starts talking with exaggerated diction. Being the good friend that you are, you consider adapting a character to suit your friend, but no matter how hard you try, a tale about five clog-dancing mountaineers just cannot accommodate a unidexter. Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). A Reviewer Misunderstands Your Ironic Self-Help Bo. You Win an Award. A Stor...

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Generate a Band Name. Tell us a bit about your band. Two adjectives to describe it (e.g. shouty, rock, indie). The lead member's first name (e.g. Kurt, Freddie, Cheryl). A place that has special significance to your band (e.g. London, Liverpool, New York). A singular noun (e.g. heart, guitar, drum kit). A plural noun (e.g. hearts, guitars, drums). A verb ending in 'ing' (e.g. rocking, rapping, singing). A day, month or season (e.g. Monday, February, autumn). In association with How Not to Self-Publish.

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2013 SpaSpa Awards | BookHippo.uk

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This website uses cookies. By using our service you are consenting to us placing cookies on your computer. Close. Get Daily Bargains in Your Inbox. Bull; Data Protection and Privacy. BookHippo.uk is a participant of the following affiliate programmes:. Amazon EU Associates Programme, Kobo and Apple. More info. List a new release. Get one of our badges. Get a professional cover. List a new release. Get one of our badges. Get a professional cover. Get daily bargain list. Get one of our badges. When a horri...

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About Rosen Trevithick | Rosen Trevithick

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This website uses cookies. By browsing my site you are consenting to having cookies placed on your computer. Close. This is Rosen's site for adults only. Children please see SmellyTrolls.co.uk. Number 1 Bestselling Author. Rosen was born in Cornwall. She studied psychology at Oxford before moving back to the West Country. Readers have downloaded over a quarter of a million copies of Rosen's books. Several titles have broken into the Amazon charts, including a number 1 humorous fiction bestseller. She was...

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Two Shades of the Lilac Sunset | Rosen Trevithick

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This website uses cookies. By browsing my site you are consenting to having cookies placed on your computer. Close. This is Rosen's site for adults only. Children please see SmellyTrolls.co.uk. Number 1 Bestselling Author. Rosen was born in Cornwall. She studied psychology at Oxford before moving back to the West Country. Readers have downloaded over a quarter of a million copies of Rosen's books. Several titles have broken into the Amazon charts, including a number 1 humorous fiction bestseller. In cont...

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Rosen Trevithick

http://rosentrevithick.co.uk/blog

This website uses cookies. By browsing my site you are consenting to having cookies placed on your computer. Close. This is Rosen's site for adults only. Children please see SmellyTrolls.co.uk. Number 1 Bestselling Author. Rosen was born in Cornwall. She studied psychology at Oxford before moving back to the West Country. Readers have downloaded over a quarter of a million copies of Rosen's books. Several titles have broken into the Amazon charts, including a number 1 humorous fiction bestseller. Would y...

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SpaSpa Book Awards | BookHippo.uk

http://bookhippo.uk/awards

This website uses cookies. By using our service you are consenting to us placing cookies on your computer. Close. Get Daily Offers in Your Inbox. Bull; Data Protection and Privacy. Tell us about an offer. List a new release. Get one of our badges. Get a professional cover. Tell us about an offer. List a new release. Get one of our badges. Get a professional cover. Ways to Follow Offers. Get daily bargain list. Get one of our badges. Self-Published and Small Press. Overall Best Book of 2014. Two years aft...

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Child Safety Guidelines | Rosen Trevithick

http://www.rosentrevithick.co.uk/241/child-safety-guidelines.html

This website uses cookies. By browsing my site you are consenting to having cookies placed on your computer. Close. This is Rosen's site for adults only. Children please see SmellyTrolls.co.uk. Number 1 Bestselling Author. Rosen was born in Cornwall. She studied psychology at Oxford before moving back to the West Country. Readers have downloaded over a quarter of a million copies of Rosen's books. Several titles have broken into the Amazon charts, including a number 1 humorous fiction bestseller. Adults&...

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How Not to Self-Publish - The Totally Splendid Hotshot Author's Survival Guide

Saturday, 1 November 2014. You’re Assassinated Mid-Series. Signs of a problem. Breath absent; skin cold to touch. Feeling pretty darn cheesed off. Your friends warned you about the dangers of tackling stalkers, cocaine addicts and critical reviews but would you listen? As a result of your pig-headedness, you are now dead – assassinated by Shit-Hot Rod. Ah, your flatulent giant series. You re-create it in your mind – giants bottom burping whilst up ladders, giants bottom burping whilst up beanst...In the ...

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