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This is what it was

This is what it was. It’s Because We Never Will. January 25, 2014. Do I trust a person? Do I trust my leaders? Or worse: Do my leaders trust me? It is truly a broken circle and runs the same rout over and over again cutting the grooves deeper and evidence sharper. I can’t win, so I fail. On every turn. Will I trust people when they say something that hurts… will I trust them to know that they love me and it wasn’t meant to hurt. Will someone trust that in me? Palaces, Crowns, Gold and Rings. I love that ...

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This is what it was | jlecks.wordpress.com Reviews

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This is what it was. It’s Because We Never Will. January 25, 2014. Do I trust a person? Do I trust my leaders? Or worse: Do my leaders trust me? It is truly a broken circle and runs the same rout over and over again cutting the grooves deeper and evidence sharper. I can’t win, so I fail. On every turn. Will I trust people when they say something that hurts… will I trust them to know that they love me and it wasn’t meant to hurt. Will someone trust that in me? Palaces, Crowns, Gold and Rings. I love that ...

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This is what it was | jlecks.wordpress.com Reviews

https://jlecks.wordpress.com

This is what it was. It’s Because We Never Will. January 25, 2014. Do I trust a person? Do I trust my leaders? Or worse: Do my leaders trust me? It is truly a broken circle and runs the same rout over and over again cutting the grooves deeper and evidence sharper. I can’t win, so I fail. On every turn. Will I trust people when they say something that hurts… will I trust them to know that they love me and it wasn’t meant to hurt. Will someone trust that in me? Palaces, Crowns, Gold and Rings. I love that ...

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jlecks.wordpress.com

1

This is what it was

https://jlecks.wordpress.com/2011/04/21/13

This is what it was. Soft Spots. Don’t touch! April 21, 2011. This State. I find myself in. Shame Pain. Loneliness. I find comfort in someone writing, and knowing, and describing. Someone who made it through this “season”, as he calls it. Some Mark Buchanan for ya-. He describes this as Winter:. As in Ecclesiastes: “I find no pleasure in them.”. 8220;Winter seems all-consuming and never ending.”. 8220;Winter hides God. It has power to sever my knowledge. God from my experience. 8220;Abandonment. Reje...

2

Palaces, Crowns, Gold and Rings | This is what it was

https://jlecks.wordpress.com/2012/09/12/palaces-crowns-gold-and-rings

This is what it was. Oh Fish, Oh Great Fish of the Sea. It’s Because We Never Will →. Palaces, Crowns, Gold and Rings. September 12, 2012. I know that pain and that pain knows me. It knows my instincts and my mishaps. It initiates my tendencies to hide and blend and camouflage to the backdrop. It knows my name. Distance and space between and repetition that leads me to the misunderstanding that changes my basic concept of gray. And yet, never alone. Even when I am hidden. You. Are. Near. But, Son of man,...

3

This is what it was

https://jlecks.wordpress.com/2011/02/28/14

This is what it was. Next Post →. February 28, 2011. Watching my dreams die. There are no more. There is no calling. There is nothing. There is no love that pursues. There is no one. This is all there is. The lights go out all around me. One last candle to keep out the night. And then the darkness surrounds me. I know I’m alive but I feel like I’ve died. And all that’s left is to accept that it’s over. My dreams ran like sand through the fists that I made. I try to keep warm but I just grow colder. After...

4

Oh Fish, Oh Great Fish of the Sea | This is what it was

https://jlecks.wordpress.com/2011/08/01/oh-fish-oh-great-fish-of-the-sea

This is what it was. Palaces, Crowns, Gold and Rings →. Oh Fish, Oh Great Fish of the Sea. August 1, 2011. I understood your words as they presented the dream and the hope, the light and the lack of brevity that existed in your defined context. I was hidden under water in my Avatar world. Rescue is fascinating like sheepskin and the belly of a fish. Rescue is illuminated by the lackluster moment that painted the predicament in the first place. Maybe it is nearly always a set-up. And God hates it. But, we...

5

About | This is what it was

https://jlecks.wordpress.com/about

This is what it was. This is an example of a page. Unlike posts, which are displayed on your blog’s front page in the order they’re published, pages are better suited for more timeless content that you want to be easily accessible, like your About or Contact information. Click the Edit link to make changes to this page or add another page. Leave a Reply Cancel reply. Enter your comment here. Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:. Address never made public). Blog at WordPress.com.

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Placenta what? The beginning of problems. | A miracle in 9 months

https://crystallively.wordpress.com/2014/08/24/placenta-what-the-beginning-of-problems

A miracle in 9 months. From self, to pregnant, to two. The beginning of problems. August 24, 2014. August 24, 2014. Picture it, 18 weeks. Just ready to see my child. I NEED TO KNOW. The joy, it’s a girl. Then, “but you appear to have a placenta previa.”. In normal people terms, a low laying placenta, covering the opening of the cervix. So what does that mean for me? Doctor: As of right now we will just wait to see if it moves as your uterus grows. Oh ok, not so bad. Fast forward another two weeks. As I t...

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This is what it was

This is what it was. It’s Because We Never Will. January 25, 2014. Do I trust a person? Do I trust my leaders? Or worse: Do my leaders trust me? It is truly a broken circle and runs the same rout over and over again cutting the grooves deeper and evidence sharper. I can’t win, so I fail. On every turn. Will I trust people when they say something that hurts… will I trust them to know that they love me and it wasn’t meant to hurt. Will someone trust that in me? Palaces, Crowns, Gold and Rings. I love that ...

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