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Joleen Doreen

It's the ******* Tits.™ (may contain strong language, strong women, and strong whiskey)

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Joleen Doreen | joleendoreen.com Reviews
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It&#39;s the ******* Tits.™ (may contain strong language, strong women, and strong whiskey)
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1 joleen doreen
2 read me
3 fictional shortcomings
4 reviewmirror of erised
5 not this day
6 tada
7 clocking in at
8 email this
9 blogthis
10 share to twitter
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Joleen Doreen | joleendoreen.com Reviews

https://joleendoreen.com

It&#39;s the ******* Tits.™ (may contain strong language, strong women, and strong whiskey)

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joleendoreen.com joleendoreen.com
1

Joleen Doreen: July 2014

http://www.joleendoreen.com/2014_07_01_archive.html

It's the Fucking Tits.™ (may contain strong language, strong women, and strong whiskey). Adulthood is a lot like moldy cheese. It's gross and I don't like it. And it always smells like butt. Other than that, nearly fucking there. Everyone thinks they are in control of their children, but could you really be the boss of your child? Would you, in all of your knowledge of their flaws, willingly hire your offspring to serve in your employ? CHILDREN, AMIRIGHT, LOL. We want them to stay sweet and optimistic&#4...

2

Joleen Doreen: Fake Relationships Are Hard

http://www.joleendoreen.com/2014/05/fake-relationships-are-hard.html

It's the Fucking Tits.™ (may contain strong language, strong women, and strong whiskey). Fake Relationships Are Hard. Me and Google got in a fight. I said some things. Google said some things. Chairs were thrown. My website was cast from the internet, abandoned by its host. In the end there was no winner, but I'm clearly a loser. I searched everywhere for help but where do you turn for information without Google? Hell, I can't even say. Note: even spellcheck doesn't know what Bing is.). Work out, we have...

3

Joleen Doreen: Excite Bike

http://www.joleendoreen.com/2014/06/excite-bike.html

It's the Fucking Tits.™ (may contain strong language, strong women, and strong whiskey). Stranger things have happened. I've always enjoyed that turn of phrase. Like some convoluted justification that the nonsensical is norm. Not that THIS isn't strange, you see, just that things could be MORE strange. Don't worry about the absurdity of the situation, think about how preposterous the possibilities COULD be. Stranger things have happened. Or, stranger things are. Stranger things will happen? I was a young...

4

Joleen Doreen: November 2013

http://www.joleendoreen.com/2013_11_01_archive.html

It's the Fucking Tits.™ (may contain strong language, strong women, and strong whiskey). Does This Poem Make Me Look Fat? Insecurity should never be capitalized. It feels like i never am. In the lowercase i stay being underwhelmed. There is no doubt. That’s all, that's the ruse. Cuts deep, oh how it stings. Bitterness I taste from within. Mocking me, Here are your flaws! You have them all. Written but not read by. Fancies herself a poet. Ugh thats a downer. I like it when I am Me. I like that one, Crude.

5

Joleen Doreen: September 2013

http://www.joleendoreen.com/2013_09_01_archive.html

It's the Fucking Tits.™ (may contain strong language, strong women, and strong whiskey). Drinking in the morning is tricky business. If you're not careful you could end up standing in the kitchen at 3pm waiting for a mug of beer to answer your questions. And the 120 Minute IPA takes FOREVER to reply. Only a seasoned third-shifter can pull off a good pre-noon drunk. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yada, yada, yada. Joke's on you, asshole, I have no morals. I used to have them. Bulk rate bad decisions at a bargain!

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killercooter.blogspot.com killercooter.blogspot.com

Uterine Cancer is for Pussies: September 2009

http://killercooter.blogspot.com/2009_09_01_archive.html

Uterine Cancer is for Pussies. Terrorized by the Killer Cooter; How my who-who glows in the dark and why my cancer is better than yours. Saturday, September 26. And then so I said,. No I did NOT freaking steal it from a pediatric cancer patient! Yet as I was orbiting accusations from Nursie while aggressively defending the appearance of my new pink monkey backpack. With matching monkey lunchbox). And i use the ". Well at least I won the earlier round, in spite of nursie's disbelief at the bookbag really ...

killercooter.blogspot.com killercooter.blogspot.com

Uterine Cancer is for Pussies: In Portland It's Still 9 O'Clock.

http://killercooter.blogspot.com/2012/09/in-portland-its-still-9-oclock.html

Uterine Cancer is for Pussies. Terrorized by the Killer Cooter; How my who-who glows in the dark and why my cancer is better than yours. Saturday, September 15. In Portland It's Still 9 O'Clock. I'm hip enough to be a loser. I see it in every Fleetwood Mac cassette I pop into the tapedeck. It's been many many years since I've had the task of admitting it. The wonderful part of the new-found (old-lost? Who has 2 thumbs and can't believe Henry Winkler is still kicking it? My older brother had this little c...

killercooter.blogspot.com killercooter.blogspot.com

Uterine Cancer is for Pussies: October 2009

http://killercooter.blogspot.com/2009_10_01_archive.html

Uterine Cancer is for Pussies. Terrorized by the Killer Cooter; How my who-who glows in the dark and why my cancer is better than yours. Saturday, October 31. Throw Drama from the Train. Finding out I had cancer made me pretty happy. I have a knack for answering the knock of the knavish opportunities, a panache for purveying preposterous peccadillos, and a flair for fuckin up. Failure might even be the only thing I have ever succeeded at. And I do it very well indeed. Everybody makes mistakes,. Where i h...

killercooter.blogspot.com killercooter.blogspot.com

Uterine Cancer is for Pussies: August 2012

http://killercooter.blogspot.com/2012_08_01_archive.html

Uterine Cancer is for Pussies. Terrorized by the Killer Cooter; How my who-who glows in the dark and why my cancer is better than yours. Friday, August 31. Feed Me, D&C More. Every once in a great while you stumble upon a blog so moving and poignant, so elegantly worded and brilliantly composed that it rocks your previous assumptions of the written word to the very core. This is not that blog. But while you're here,. Let's have a laugh about my cooter, shall we? That pussy is hysterical! Joleen, You Have.

killercooter.blogspot.com killercooter.blogspot.com

Uterine Cancer is for Pussies: September 2012

http://killercooter.blogspot.com/2012_09_01_archive.html

Uterine Cancer is for Pussies. Terrorized by the Killer Cooter; How my who-who glows in the dark and why my cancer is better than yours. Thursday, September 27. Welcome back, familiar readers! Welcome aboard, people looking for puke! Undoubtedly I will die at the vicious hand of a Killer Cooter. Did you motherfuckers know that there's a turtle called a COOTER? And why in the fuck has NOBODY TOLD ME THIS SOONER? I know the things I have done have not always been right, I just didn't think I would be left.

killercooter.blogspot.com killercooter.blogspot.com

Uterine Cancer is for Pussies: November 2009

http://killercooter.blogspot.com/2009_11_01_archive.html

Uterine Cancer is for Pussies. Terrorized by the Killer Cooter; How my who-who glows in the dark and why my cancer is better than yours. Saturday, November 7. A colonoscopy is a pain in the ass. And that's not even the joke yet.). The shittiest part is the preparation required to clear the way. There it is.). In the days before, they put a fiber cap on your ass;. In all actuality,. You're going to wage a war on the toilet. Move that one over here. What kind of cut is this? And then asleep you go. Small" ...

killercooter.blogspot.com killercooter.blogspot.com

Uterine Cancer is for Pussies: September 2010

http://killercooter.blogspot.com/2010_09_01_archive.html

Uterine Cancer is for Pussies. Terrorized by the Killer Cooter; How my who-who glows in the dark and why my cancer is better than yours. Saturday, September 18. We all scream for my spleen. Before you get all. Joleen, where the hell. Know this: Cancer gives me permission to be lazy ass. And, truth be told, I haven't felt much like sharing lately. There's no news that's good news. A quick synopsis of 2010 thus far;. Order up a round of bloodwork, on me! Hey June, don't make it bad. Specifically EBV infect...

killercooter.blogspot.com killercooter.blogspot.com

Uterine Cancer is for Pussies: Words, Weed, & Whiskey

http://killercooter.blogspot.com/2012/09/weed-words-and-whiskey.html

Uterine Cancer is for Pussies. Terrorized by the Killer Cooter; How my who-who glows in the dark and why my cancer is better than yours. Sunday, September 9. Words, Weed, and Whiskey. Direction is a funny thing. It can point you right, bring you down, fuck you up, and spin you round. Staying on path is a matter of course, moving to the destination is a matter of force. The right way will steer you wrong if being left behind is where you should be all along. Without knowing where I'm going,. I need a map.

killercooter.blogspot.com killercooter.blogspot.com

Uterine Cancer is for Pussies: Turtle Power

http://killercooter.blogspot.com/2012/09/turtle-power.html

Uterine Cancer is for Pussies. Terrorized by the Killer Cooter; How my who-who glows in the dark and why my cancer is better than yours. Thursday, September 27. Welcome back, familiar readers! Welcome aboard, people looking for puke! Undoubtedly I will die at the vicious hand of a Killer Cooter. Did you motherfuckers know that there's a turtle called a COOTER? And why in the fuck has NOBODY TOLD ME THIS SOONER? I know the things I have done have not always been right, I just didn't think I would be left.

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It's the Fucking Tits.™ (may contain strong language, strong women, and strong whiskey). Emotional scenes need more comic props. Next time you have a meltdown, bring a rubber chicken. Don the giant bowtie while sobbing that it's over. Blend those tears with the spewed disdain from a spitting flower. Furthermore, drunk people should be encouraged to do magic. They have a Groupon. They know my name. I don't meet a lot of people that like me. His girlfriend really loves him. Still, you need conditions.

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