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Tales From the Road

Tuesday, August 31, 2010. Til Death Do Us Part. I had an entertaining run tonight. Normally, I only deliver Friday and Saturday nights, but I picked up a shift. To which he responded "WHY DON'T YOU SHUT UP! After this sequence, which eerily reminded me of George Costanza's parents screaming on "Seinfeld", the man handed me a $20 bill, still told me to keep the buck, and the couple acted like nothing ever happened. At least they agreed on pizza toppings. Sunday, July 25, 2010. This post is probably well-t...

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Tales From the Road | lancethepizzaguy.blogspot.com Reviews
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Tuesday, August 31, 2010. Til Death Do Us Part. I had an entertaining run tonight. Normally, I only deliver Friday and Saturday nights, but I picked up a shift. To which he responded WHY DON'T YOU SHUT UP! After this sequence, which eerily reminded me of George Costanza's parents screaming on Seinfeld, the man handed me a $20 bill, still told me to keep the buck, and the couple acted like nothing ever happened. At least they agreed on pizza toppings. Sunday, July 25, 2010. This post is probably well-t...
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Tales From the Road | lancethepizzaguy.blogspot.com Reviews

https://lancethepizzaguy.blogspot.com

Tuesday, August 31, 2010. Til Death Do Us Part. I had an entertaining run tonight. Normally, I only deliver Friday and Saturday nights, but I picked up a shift. To which he responded "WHY DON'T YOU SHUT UP! After this sequence, which eerily reminded me of George Costanza's parents screaming on "Seinfeld", the man handed me a $20 bill, still told me to keep the buck, and the couple acted like nothing ever happened. At least they agreed on pizza toppings. Sunday, July 25, 2010. This post is probably well-t...

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Tales From the Road: Ode to Stiffers

http://www.lancethepizzaguy.blogspot.com/2009/04/ode-to-stiffers.html

Saturday, April 25, 2009. The rims on your Escalade cost more than my car, but you "can't afford to tip me since times are tight". I hope you learn what "times are tight" REALLY means. Your parents sent you to the door to pay and you pocketed my tip. I hope the money falls out of your pocket in front of your parents and Daddy finds the biggest paddle and the firmest belt in the house, and unleashes a whipping that Chuck Norris would envy. April 27, 2009 at 10:49 AM. Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom).

2

Tales From the Road: February 2009

http://www.lancethepizzaguy.blogspot.com/2009_02_01_archive.html

Friday, February 6, 2009. Is a Dollar Cool? Is a dollar cool? I was faced with that question 8 days ago at Conway Trucking around 5:30 pm, after brilliantly navigating Hilliard rush hour traffic, waiting 3 minutes for the guy to come out, and persevering through the aftermath of a violent snowstorm in the preceding 48 hours, which was essentially an area-wide skating rink. A dollar, he drove all this way and waited for your a-! Come on man, a dollar? What is this, 1975? Fast forward 1 week:. I immediatel...

3

Tales From the Road: September 2008

http://www.lancethepizzaguy.blogspot.com/2008_09_01_archive.html

Sunday, September 28, 2008. It was my first delivery of the night at Sparano's, and I was already feeling great. During the 40 minutes between the end of my Pizza Hut shift and my first delivery at Sparano's, I got my $2.00 after 2 pm Mocha Frappucino, and Michigan had turned a 19-0 deficit into a 19-14 mid-4th quarter gleam of hope. Now that is how I like to start a shift. Thursday, September 11, 2008. Dear SIRIUS, I love you. SIRIUS Satellite Radio,. It's also nice to listen to music without being inte...

4

Tales From the Road: July 2009

http://www.lancethepizzaguy.blogspot.com/2009_07_01_archive.html

Saturday, July 25, 2009. I Wish You Would Order From Someone Else. Here's a dollar. I wish we could give you more.". I smirk, take the dollar, and say "take care". Behind the smirk, there is a lot more going on in my mind. Here's your food. I wish I could have gotten it here sooner. Unfortunately, the good tippers got theirs in. Subscribe to: Posts (Atom). Tales From the Road. I Wish You Would Order From Someone Else. View my complete profile.

5

Tales From the Road: July 2008

http://www.lancethepizzaguy.blogspot.com/2008_07_01_archive.html

Thursday, July 24, 2008. Tonight was a slow night.  I could have easily handled the after 9 pm traffic single-handedly, but had another driver with me. I should take advantage of slow nights more than I do.  Here are a few things I should do when it's slow:. Slower nights mean excess dough.  I should make pizzas with the excess dough and sell them to bars.  "Hot selling" or the less PC "pimping pizzas" are the terms used to commonly describe this practice. Extra cleaning tasks. (just kidding). I am out o...

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Arms and Hearts and Alcohol and Faith: The Carter Six Degrees of Separation

http://spgordon.blogspot.com/2010/07/carter-six-degrees-of-separation.html

Arms and Hearts and Alcohol and Faith. Monday, July 12, 2010. The Carter Six Degrees of Separation. Lil Wayne is the Kevin Bacon of Facebook, basically. Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). Ocean of Night – The Editors Been listening to this song and. WHY, HELLO THERE! Things I've Meant To Write About Here, But Totally Haven't. The search for the best middle-class tax cut. Actually, Let’s Not Be in the Moment. Til Death Do Us Part. The Daily Dish By Andrew Sullivan. Abbiamo imparato a fare la pasta!

spgordon.blogspot.com spgordon.blogspot.com

Arms and Hearts and Alcohol and Faith: Best. Most Important. My Favorite.

http://spgordon.blogspot.com/2010/06/best-most-important-my-favorite.html

Arms and Hearts and Alcohol and Faith. Wednesday, June 30, 2010. Best Most Important. My Favorite. The Blue Album. Pinkerton. Biggie. Jay-Z. Lil Wayne. Hopslam. Oberon. Two-Hearted Ale. Bratwurst. Hamburgers. Hot dogs. Shawn Michaels. Hulk Hogan. The Ultimate Warrior. Burger King. McDonald's. Wendy's. Japan America. Germany.*. Baseball. Basketball. Football. Executive. Legislative. Judicial. Jughead. Archie. Reggie. Cars, not people. Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). WHY, HELLO THERE! I Saw the Sign.

spgordon.blogspot.com spgordon.blogspot.com

Arms and Hearts and Alcohol and Faith: Game Time

http://spgordon.blogspot.com/2010/07/game-time.html

Arms and Hearts and Alcohol and Faith. Saturday, July 3, 2010. Here's a new game I made up. Of the following blocks of text, two are recent Missed Connection postings from Grand Rapids' Craigslist page, of which I've altered only the line breaks, capitalization, and punctuation (to maximize poetic value), and the other is an actual poem by John Berryman. You decide which is which. Go! I saw you recently. At Meijer in your Saturn. There was a little girl. In the back seat. D like to be your baby daddy.

spgordon.blogspot.com spgordon.blogspot.com

Arms and Hearts and Alcohol and Faith: September 2010

http://spgordon.blogspot.com/2010_09_01_archive.html

Arms and Hearts and Alcohol and Faith. Wednesday, September 29, 2010. You surely recognize my car, with which I am inextricably linked. Well, today that car was the subject of an office-wide email, which no less than fifty people received. The subject line was "Green Cadillac," and the email itself said this, and this alone:. Does anyone know who the owner is of the older green Cadillac that has been parking in our lot on a regular basis? I am that owner! Subscribe to: Posts (Atom). WHY, HELLO THERE!

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Arms and Hearts and Alcohol and Faith: I'm Assuming the Rent is Payable in Erectile Dysfunction Medication

http://spgordon.blogspot.com/2010/07/im-assuming-rent-is-payable-in-erectile.html

Arms and Hearts and Alcohol and Faith. Monday, July 5, 2010. I'm Assuming the Rent is Payable in Erectile Dysfunction Medication. Here's some unusual email correspondence I had over the weekend. Up first, me:. Hello, I am writing in response to your Craigslist ad ("3 Bed, 2 Bath 2,100 Sq Ft on 0.95 Acres"). Could you please tell me the address of the house, and the date that it will be available? Also, are you interested in selling it as well, or just renting? July 7, 2010 at 11:14 AM. Im guessing you gu...

spgordon.blogspot.com spgordon.blogspot.com

Arms and Hearts and Alcohol and Faith: The Debut of Ollie

http://spgordon.blogspot.com/2010/07/debut-of-ollie.html

Arms and Hearts and Alcohol and Faith. Monday, July 19, 2010. The Debut of Ollie. My roommate Erin got a new puppy yesterday. His name is Ollie. He is supposed to be a maltese, though I'm not entirely convinced he isn't actually some kind of adorable hamster-muppet hybrid. Chani's basically okay with this arrangement:. He's super-tiny, though- he'll probably end up being like three or four pounds. Hobbies include biting string, napping. July 19, 2010 at 12:14 PM. Like after GRs best cabby?

sexandpizza.wordpress.com sexandpizza.wordpress.com

Diary of a single, almost 30 year-old, queer, college graduated, pizza delivery girl and phone sex operator | Page 2

https://sexandpizza.wordpress.com/page/2

Diary of a single, almost 30 year-old, queer, college graduated, pizza delivery girl and phone sex operator. Thursday 16th July, 2009. Posted by writer under pizza. Worked four hours, took six deliveries, got $10.00 reimbursement, and made $22.98 in tips. Equalling $5.50 per delivery and $15.21 an hour after taxes. Wednesday 15th July, 2009. Posted by writer under pizza. Worked six hours, took eleven deliveries, got $18.00 reimbursement and made $42.74 in tips. Friday 10th July, 2009. Worked five hours, ...

spgordon.blogspot.com spgordon.blogspot.com

Arms and Hearts and Alcohol and Faith: The Plot Thickens

http://spgordon.blogspot.com/2010/09/plot-thickens.html

Arms and Hearts and Alcohol and Faith. Wednesday, September 29, 2010. You surely recognize my car, with which I am inextricably linked. Well, today that car was the subject of an office-wide email, which no less than fifty people received. The subject line was "Green Cadillac," and the email itself said this, and this alone:. Does anyone know who the owner is of the older green Cadillac that has been parking in our lot on a regular basis? I am that owner! September 29, 2010 at 9:36 PM. Ha, okay, more det...

spgordon.blogspot.com spgordon.blogspot.com

Arms and Hearts and Alcohol and Faith: June 2010

http://spgordon.blogspot.com/2010_06_01_archive.html

Arms and Hearts and Alcohol and Faith. Wednesday, June 30, 2010. Best Most Important. My Favorite. The Blue Album. Pinkerton. Biggie. Jay-Z. Lil Wayne. Hopslam. Oberon. Two-Hearted Ale. Bratwurst. Hamburgers. Hot dogs. Shawn Michaels. Hulk Hogan. The Ultimate Warrior. Burger King. McDonald's. Wendy's. Japan America. Germany.*. Baseball. Basketball. Football. Executive. Legislative. Judicial. Jughead. Archie. Reggie. Cars, not people. Friday, June 25, 2010. I Saw the Sign. Constructive Summer, Part II.

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Tales From the Road

Tuesday, August 31, 2010. Til Death Do Us Part. I had an entertaining run tonight. Normally, I only deliver Friday and Saturday nights, but I picked up a shift. To which he responded "WHY DON'T YOU SHUT UP! After this sequence, which eerily reminded me of George Costanza's parents screaming on "Seinfeld", the man handed me a $20 bill, still told me to keep the buck, and the couple acted like nothing ever happened. At least they agreed on pizza toppings. Sunday, July 25, 2010. This post is probably well-t...

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