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Email Gems: June 2012
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Saturday, June 23, 2012. God Loves Drunk People Too! A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push. Not a chance," says the husband, it is 3:00 in the morning! He slams the door and returns to bed. Just some drunk guy asking for a push," he answers. Did you help him? No, I did not, it is 3:00 in the morning and it is pouring rain out there! Calls out the husband.
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Email Gems: March 2014
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Monday, March 3, 2014. Are You a True Christian? OH, HOW IMPORTANT TO WALK THE WALK and NOT JUST TALK THE TALK! The light turned yellow, just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection. The tailgating woman was furious and honked her horn, screaming in frustration, as she missed her chance to get through the intersection, dropping her cell phone and makeup. Monday, March 03, 2014. Enjoy our co...
emailgems.blogspot.com
Email Gems: Are You a True Christian?
http://emailgems.blogspot.com/2014/03/are-you-true-christian.html
Monday, March 3, 2014. Are You a True Christian? OH, HOW IMPORTANT TO WALK THE WALK and NOT JUST TALK THE TALK! The light turned yellow, just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection. The tailgating woman was furious and honked her horn, screaming in frustration, as she missed her chance to get through the intersection, dropping her cell phone and makeup. Monday, March 03, 2014. I'm still ro...
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Email Gems: October 2013
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Thursday, October 31, 2013. They Cut My Britches Off - FUNNY Video. This is too good! They Cut My Britches Off! In case you do not know him - Mark is a Baptist minister with a funny sense of humor, and a member of Bill Gaither’s team. Here, Mark tells about having a motorcycle wreck (while not wearing a helmet) and what happened to him afterward. Acceptable for all ages. Thursday, October 31, 2013. Thursday, October 24, 2013. The Porch - Very FUNNY Blonde Joke. That's a bit cynical, isn't it? The wife re...
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Email Gems: July 2012
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Saturday, July 28, 2012. Why Teachers Drink - FUNNY! The following questions were set in last year's GED examination. These are genuine answers (from 16 year olds).and they WILL breed. Q Name the four seasons. A Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar. Q Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink. A Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists. Q How is dew formed. Q What causes the tides in the oceans. Q How can y...
emailgems.blogspot.com
Email Gems: October 2011
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Monday, October 31, 2011. Keep the gray matter active. Keep the gray matter active. 1 Johnny's mother had three children. The first child was named April. The second child was named May. What was the third child's name? 2 There is a clerk at the butcher shop, he is five feet ten inches tall and he wears size 13 sneakers. What does he weigh? 3 Before Mt. Everest was discovered, what was the highest mountain in the world? 4 How much dirt is there in a hole that measures two feet by three feet by four feet?
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Email Gems: November 2011
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Tuesday, November 22, 2011. This is why I forward jokes. This explains why I forward jokes. A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead. He remembered dying, and that the dog walking beside him had been dead for years. He wondered where the road was leading them. After a while, they came to a high, white stone wall along one side of the road. It looked like fine marble. When he was close enough, he called out,. As he app...
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Email Gems: July 2014
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Monday, July 14, 2014. I just took a. Leaflet out of my mailbox,. Informing me that I can. Have sex at 73. I'm so happy, because I live at. So it's not too far to walk home. It's the same side of the street. I don't even have. To cross the road! I am not available right now,. Thank you for caring enough to call. Some changes in my life. Please leave a message. If I do not return your. You are one of the. My wife and I had. Words, but I didn't get to use. Frustration is trying to. Blessed are those who can.
emailgems.blogspot.com
Email Gems: July 2013
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Monday, July 1, 2013. Why TAPS is Played at Funderals. Here is an interesting but probably not exactly factual account of why Taps is played at Military Funerals. For more, see the Wikipedia article on Taps, here: http:/ en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Taps. If any of you have ever been to a military funeral in which taps was played; this brings out a new meaning of it. Here is something Every American should know. But, do you know the story behind the song? The Captain lit a lantern and suddenly caught his breath...
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Email Gems: January 2012
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Saturday, January 21, 2012. A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor said that the hospital was testing an amazing new high-tech machine that would transfer a portion of the mother's labor pain to the baby's Father. He asked if they were interested. Both said they were very much in favor of it. The doctor set the pain transfer to 10% for starters, explaining that even 10% was probably more pain than the father had ever experienced Before. Preacher...
