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The Adventures of Flossie: July 2003

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The Adventures of Flossie. Thursday, July 31, 2003. Something I forgot in all the, umm, excitement of yesterday: is there an exciting new trend among the young folk for wearing jeans inside out? Wednesday, July 30, 2003. Except for minor tweaking for spelling, grammar, and not quite being able to read what I wrote. Thank you for your time. Even when/if the train reaches Stratford I will have no idea of what to do for the best. Do I stay on the train? The freight train is parked at Stratford, which is rea...

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The Adventures of Flossie: May 2004

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The Adventures of Flossie. Sunday, May 30, 2004. I just went to start the video for 15 Storeys High. Only to discover that it's been replaced by a programme on Israel's Nuclear Whistleblower. Unless one of the conditions of his release was that he was only allowed to be interviewed in a dingy club with loud dance music playing in the background in an attempt to keep him quiet. SO, MORDECHAI, WHY DID YOU REVEAL ISRAEL'S NUCLEAR CAPABILITY? SORRY, DIDN'T QUITE CATCH THAT.". Friday, May 21, 2004. I'm being ...

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The Adventures of Flossie: July 2002

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The Adventures of Flossie. Tuesday, July 30, 2002. Except for Ilford, which remains bone dry and stagnant. We had the thunder (one clap) and the lightning (one bolt) and then. nothing. And this is deeply unfair, not just because we need it because the air is still suffocatingly horrible, but because watching great big gobbets of rain with the occasional loud noise is an excellent thing to do, and because I'd rather have it happen now rather than when I'm trying to sleep. Monday, July 29, 2002. Towards Ch...

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The Adventures of Flossie: June 2004

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The Adventures of Flossie. Wednesday, June 30, 2004. Opinionated local newsreaders who tell me that it's going to be a miserable journey to work because the tubes aren't running: miserable for who? I quite like a bit of a walk in the morning, so stick to the facts. Sunday, June 27, 2004. And how come, after feeling utterly exhausted all day, I should have started feeling full of vim and energy around about midnight? What do the really bad ones say then? Friday, June 25, 2004. Two questions spring to mind.

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The Adventures of Flossie: January 2004

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The Adventures of Flossie. Friday, January 30, 2004. Yes, all right, I know. I've been busy, really I have. It's this sort of thing that makes The Adventures of Flossie what it is today - a page read by maybe 12 people, all of whom have a keen interest in the exact mechanics of dogs driving milkfloats. (*) So much for the lucrative advertising deal I was planning anyway - I fear the group is far too niche, somehow. And, really, what's not to love? I suspect I'll probably stick it in a drawer somewhere, i...

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The Adventures of Flossie: August 2003

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The Adventures of Flossie. Saturday, August 30, 2003. There was a point to this story, or a moral, or something, but I've forgotten it now. Which is quite appropriate in the circumstances, really. Thursday, August 28, 2003. It wasn't until waiting for a train to make its way through the signal failures at Liverpool Street that I found out that it was a power failure. VOICE OVER: Passengers on tube trains were trapped underground, and had to be led along the tracks and up the stairs to safety. Actually, d...

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The Adventures of Flossie: March 2004

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The Adventures of Flossie. Monday, March 29, 2004. I then failed to do anything for three days. Hurrah! Say what you like about the clocks going forward, it certainly sorts out who the serious Sunday morning shoppers are. Last week I went to Tesco on Sunday and it was stupidly crowded (and they'd idiotically positioned the "forgotten Mother's Day? Thursday, March 25, 2004. THE OFFICIAL THE ADVENTURES OF FLOSSIE 2ND ANNIVERSARY COMMEMORATIVE POSTING ENTRY TYPE THING. Sneeze sniff splutter cough). Not that...

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The Adventures of Flossie: January 2003

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The Adventures of Flossie. Thursday, January 30, 2003. I've turned into the sort of person who shouts abuse at the television screen. I used to do this now and again if I thought of something particularly witty to say, but now it's just turning into abuse. London Underground Customer Relations bloke says "We'd never do anything to put any of our customers in danger"? DON'T LIE. Vox-pop woman says "It's taken me three and a half hours to get to work, it's terrible! IT'S TERRIBLE, IS IT? So This is me offi...

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The Adventures of Flossie: December 2002

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The Adventures of Flossie. Tuesday, December 31, 2002. I'd just finished an entry on feeling much more cheerful, which I'd typed straight into Blogger rather than tap it all out beforehand and then paste it in, only for my computer to do some sort of complicated lurch in which some "files" were "damaged" in ways in which I cannot bring myself to speculate upon. So - oh, the irony! My attempts to claim cheerfulness ended up with me getting rather vexed. Tcha! So you haven't missed much, then. Yesterday mo...

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The Adventures of Flossie: August 2004

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The Adventures of Flossie. Monday, August 30, 2004. I should point out that I'm referring to proper volleyball here, rather than beach volleyball. Beach volleyball is resolutely dull, but features competitors in small outfits and a blast of YMCA over the tannoy after each point, presumably to keep the crowd awake. Proper volleyball is fairly dull but with occasional bits of high excitement, and is much the superior event.). Thursday, August 26, 2004. Well, that actually happened to me today. Certain ...