mysearchforfreedom.blogspot.com
MySearchForFreedom: October 2011
http://mysearchforfreedom.blogspot.com/2011_10_01_archive.html
Welcome to My Search for Freedom. Saturday, 22 October 2011. We are Not Alone! WE ARE NOT ALONE! For so long, I sufferred silently, pushing down the feelings, the pain, the sorrow, the fear, the guilt, the shame of childhood sexual abuse, physical abuse and neglect. For so long, I thought, "I'm a weirdo" or "Soemthing is wrong with me". I just joined a ASSA group - Adult Survivors of Sexual Abuse! I am not alone. We are not alone! I understand them too! But now, I know I'm not battling this alone. The Co...
mysearchforfreedom.blogspot.com
MySearchForFreedom: Can a Christian be Lost?
http://mysearchforfreedom.blogspot.com/2011/08/can-christian-be-lost.html
Welcome to My Search for Freedom. Sunday, 14 August 2011. Can a Christian be Lost? I feel lost. Who the hell am I? Since my childhood abuse, my teenage rebellion, at 19 years old, I turned to the Church in search of love truth and guidence. Now I'm 32. My last 10 years, seemed to be Blissful, and BLESSED! But TRULY TRULY, was it? Somewhere along the way, being a Christian, I lost myself! For example, prayer, devotions, baptism, go to bible school, go on mission trips, serve the homeless). What do I think...
mysearchforfreedom.blogspot.com
MySearchForFreedom: Ending Verbal Abuse
http://mysearchforfreedom.blogspot.com/2011/11/ending-verbal-abuse.html
Welcome to My Search for Freedom. Tuesday, 22 November 2011. Not a surprise is it, that I'm writing AGAIN! Week after week, I get yelled at for trivial things. This time, my husband asked me to call his friend while he was driving. So I called and put him on speaker phone. My husband lashed out , "I said call him, not call him and put him on speaker phone! Can't you do something so simple? My husband was SOOOO sweet! He would never even swear at me. I remember those days! Well, NO MORE! Well I told him, ...
painprime.wordpress.com
I miss… | A Walk Through The Darkness Of Chronic Pain And Depression...
https://painprime.wordpress.com/2014/11/17/i-miss
A Walk Through The Darkness Of Chronic Pain And Depression…. Just another WordPress.com weblog. I feel a longing for the days of old. The sharp cold dawns of my youth,. Blowing in through the cracks around my windows. The ice sparkling in the midnight skies. I miss the smell of a 70’s Ford. The bark of a log as it is split in the cold,. And its crackle as it warms the house. And the smell of baking bread lofted into air on the songs of my Mother’s joy. I miss the sharp joy at the crack of a rifle,. Notif...
mysearchforfreedom.blogspot.com
MySearchForFreedom: August 2011
http://mysearchforfreedom.blogspot.com/2011_08_01_archive.html
Welcome to My Search for Freedom. Monday, 29 August 2011. I Want to Find Myself Again. So my last post was about feeling lost and at 32 I'm now finally starting to realize why and how this has happened. 1 Childhood abuse deposits shame. 2 Live life with coverings and detached from real authentic relationships b/c I believe that "something is wrong with me" in my very core. 3 Teenage rebellion and boy craziness b/c I lack a father's HEALTHY affirmations (more shame). 5 10 years in church, still lost.
mysearchforfreedom.blogspot.com
MySearchForFreedom: Letter to Me today - Nov 5, 2011
http://mysearchforfreedom.blogspot.com/2011/11/letter-to-me-today-nov-5-2011.html
Welcome to My Search for Freedom. Saturday, 5 November 2011. Letter to Me today - Nov 5, 2011. Please read, the Abusive Relationship Cycle - as it happened again today, but instead of shopping I left with our baby to spend time with another girlfriend to chat. It's so difficult to share what's really happening at home. I do recognize that I am blaming myself for today's events and this blame is rooted from my childhood abuse. Children blame themselves often and I carry this now into my adulthood. Subscri...
mysearchforfreedom.blogspot.com
MySearchForFreedom: We are Not Alone!
http://mysearchforfreedom.blogspot.com/2011/10/we-are-not-alone.html
Welcome to My Search for Freedom. Saturday, 22 October 2011. We are Not Alone! WE ARE NOT ALONE! For so long, I sufferred silently, pushing down the feelings, the pain, the sorrow, the fear, the guilt, the shame of childhood sexual abuse, physical abuse and neglect. For so long, I thought, "I'm a weirdo" or "Soemthing is wrong with me". I just joined a ASSA group - Adult Survivors of Sexual Abuse! I am not alone. We are not alone! I understand them too! But now, I know I'm not battling this alone. The Co...
mysearchforfreedom.blogspot.com
MySearchForFreedom: November 2011
http://mysearchforfreedom.blogspot.com/2011_11_01_archive.html
Welcome to My Search for Freedom. Tuesday, 22 November 2011. Not a surprise is it, that I'm writing AGAIN! Week after week, I get yelled at for trivial things. This time, my husband asked me to call his friend while he was driving. So I called and put him on speaker phone. My husband lashed out , "I said call him, not call him and put him on speaker phone! Can't you do something so simple? My husband was SOOOO sweet! He would never even swear at me. I remember those days! Well, NO MORE! Well I told him, ...
mysearchforfreedom.blogspot.com
MySearchForFreedom: Freedom of Speech and Sexual Abuse
http://mysearchforfreedom.blogspot.com/2011/08/freedom-of-speech-and-sexual-abuse.html
Welcome to My Search for Freedom. Sunday, 14 August 2011. Freedom of Speech and Sexual Abuse. I grew up with my grandparents until age 8. Then my mother decided to give living with my father another try. Little did she know, my father was sexually abusing me. What I didn't know was the effects of it until now. I'm 32, married and a full-time mom. My new born baby has given me a new inspiration to be healthy, to be healed, to be free! I now realized that I internalized the SHAME that is suppose to be my f...
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