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Perfect and Starving

Wednesday, June 2, 2010. I've decided to go back to my old blog. If you'd like the link please email me at sarahewinchell @ gmail .com. PS; Im now prescribed to topamax! Monday, May 10, 2010. Back in the Day. The other day I read a post by Elle. I must be going crazy. It feels like this, at least for me. Living in a body that was on the verge of obese, and then not, it's like phantom excess weight is there and won't get out of your head. Why isn't this good enough? I wanted to stop gaining weight. Anxiet...

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Perfect and Starving | perfectandstarving.blogspot.com Reviews

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Wednesday, June 2, 2010. I've decided to go back to my old blog. If you'd like the link please email me at sarahewinchell @ gmail .com. PS; Im now prescribed to topamax! Monday, May 10, 2010. Back in the Day. The other day I read a post by Elle. I must be going crazy. It feels like this, at least for me. Living in a body that was on the verge of obese, and then not, it's like phantom excess weight is there and won't get out of your head. Why isn't this good enough? I wanted to stop gaining weight. Anxiet...

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2 moving back

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5 1 comments

6 6 comments

7 labels my ed

8 recovery

9 stress

10 thoughts

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Perfect and Starving | perfectandstarving.blogspot.com Reviews

https://perfectandstarving.blogspot.com

Wednesday, June 2, 2010. I've decided to go back to my old blog. If you'd like the link please email me at sarahewinchell @ gmail .com. PS; Im now prescribed to topamax! Monday, May 10, 2010. Back in the Day. The other day I read a post by Elle. I must be going crazy. It feels like this, at least for me. Living in a body that was on the verge of obese, and then not, it's like phantom excess weight is there and won't get out of your head. Why isn't this good enough? I wanted to stop gaining weight. Anxiet...

INTERNAL PAGES

perfectandstarving.blogspot.com

1

Perfect and Starving: Sick of Being Fat

http://perfectandstarving.blogspot.com/2010/05/sick-of-being-fat.html

Friday, May 7, 2010. Sick of Being Fat. So last night we went out to eat. It was my idea. I have these ridiculous, welljustthisonelasttimeillstartnewthisdaybecauseofthisandthat (which I need to STOP doing). And that reason would be that today is payday, and I have money again, which will be buying my groceries. I wont discuss what I ate last night, but it was enough to make me shoot up 4 pounds, which I know arent real. Pounds but still enough to piss me right off. For me, depression feels like, really w...

2

Perfect and Starving: Groceries & A Cushion Under My Arse

http://perfectandstarving.blogspot.com/2010/05/groceries-cushion-under-my-arse.html

Saturday, May 8, 2010. Groceries and A Cushion Under My Arse. Anxiety Induced shopping went well last night. Granted it takes me two hours since I go to Whole Foods and Hannaford, because all my shit isn't in one store. I bought all I needed/could bare/testify to survive so to not want to eat myself to death(aka enough but not a lot). The cushion factor would be that I actually have money left over! So on to something new; I found through Violet. A new update tool, org made by Alice. 8729;Amy's Meal (bro...

3

Perfect and Starving: Thoughts Ahead

http://perfectandstarving.blogspot.com/2010/05/thoughts-ahead.html

Wednesday, May 5, 2010. Staying at a hotel in Time Square! And then their wedding (Dad and her) June 19th, and I have a beautiful brides maids dress. Once I hit 120lbs if not less I'll post a pic in it :). Yeah I totally get the ED perfection thing. There is no such thing as normal. My body has to the perfect way I want it and anything less is hideous. The thinner I get, I dont feel fatter, but I still feel as fat as ever. Its maddening. May 6, 2010 at 4:57 PM. May 7, 2010 at 7:04 AM. May 13, 2010. That ...

4

Perfect and Starving: Where's my Head?

http://perfectandstarving.blogspot.com/2010/05/wheres-my-head.html

Monday, May 3, 2010. I try to think what 'clicked' the first time when I lost those 55lbs. All I remember is my mom moving out, me starting a job that was viewed as a career, and going to school to get my massage license. I remember being busy. Always busy. Working full time and school full time leaves little room for eating and having time to think about food. Since my boyfriend works for a cable company, we have every. Channel. All the movie channels, and half off on pay per view. Mmmhmmmm. May 13, 2010.

5

Perfect and Starving: First Post

http://perfectandstarving.blogspot.com/2010/04/first-post.html

Thursday, April 29, 2010. Suffice to say I am in 'post-recovery'. I've been through the labyrinth of my eating disorder, taking often meddling turns, and making adverse decisions, ones that got me conditioned and addicted to what I continually did to myself. The only difference in this maze is now I am not in denial of my disorder. May 3, 2010 at 2:16 PM. Created by Deluxe Templates. View my complete profile. May 13, 2010. 3 eggs, scrambled (210). Amy's Rice Bowl (290). Sidenote: I suck at updating this.

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thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com

Thinthoughts: Pledge

http://thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com/2014/07/pledge.html

Sunday, July 20, 2014. I was reading over old posts and old comments from all of you. I had forgotten about all of the wonderful people that used to be part of this community. I really miss it. I also noticed the tone of my writing has changed. I used to have a brighter outlook on things. Now I only seem to post to vent. I want to apologize for subjecting you all to my negativity. I hope you all have had a good weekend :). July 21, 2014 at 10:17 AM. Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). A Better Part Of Me.

thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com

Thinthoughts: Day 1

http://thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com/2014/07/day-1.html

Monday, July 21, 2014. Today was a pretty boring day at work. I looked up some businesses in Toronto today to see if they were hiring. Some were but nothing I was qualified for. I did find a recruitment company that has a few interesting jobs. I am going to try to call them tomorrow if I have time. Tomorrow I'm going to see justin Timberlake with my sister. I'm pretty excited. I have been waiting for this concert since my birthday in November! Well that's all for today. July 21, 2014 at 8:39 PM.

thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com

Thinthoughts: May 2014

http://thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com/2014_05_01_archive.html

Friday, May 23, 2014. I am one of the victims of the layoffs. Thankfully, they are letting my contract run out, they are just not renewing it. They also agreed to act as references, and I will be receiving a letter of reference with my last pay cheque. So my timeline for a new job is now 13 weeks. Links to this post. Thursday, May 22, 2014. I have 6 weeks to find a new job. Since my last post I've gained 4lbs. Sometimes I feel as though I can't breathe with all this pressure. Links to this post.

thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com

Thinthoughts: July 2014

http://thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com/2014_07_01_archive.html

Thursday, July 24, 2014. Sorry I didn't post yesterday. I got caught up in job applications yesterday and had a big development and then just veged last night. Obviously I said yes. So yesterday afternoon was spent composing a response to that e-mail. So far today I have:. 1 applied to another job. 2 tried to cancel my cable and ended up getting a massively huge discount from their retention program that made the total bill less than if I had canceled! 3 played some solitaire. Links to this post. I have ...

thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com

Thinthoughts: April 2014

http://thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com/2014_04_01_archive.html

Monday, April 28, 2014. Wow 2 months to the day. OK so I promised to write more, but I really haven't had anything to write about. Should I write and complain about my job? How I fail at everything? It's not fair. Why do I get the short end of the stick? How does (insert friend/acquaintance name here) get it right? What are they doing that I'm not? Opportunities never land on me.". Is there something wrong with me? It seems like every time I think I'm doing something right, it crumbles in my hands. I wor...

thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com

Thinthoughts: Justin Timberlake Concert!!!!

http://thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com/2014/07/justin-timberlake-concert.html

Tuesday, July 22, 2014. I have been waiting so long for this concert. I left work early today and met up with my sister for dinner. We went to a cute little chain restaurant and split some apps. Our seats are on the floor and the view is awesome so far. There is going to be a full "laser" (air quotes like Dr. Evil) show as well. All photos I took tonight are posted at the bottom of the post. I ended up not calling that agency today. It got too busy. So I will try again for tomorrow. My sister and I.

thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com

Thinthoughts: Update on my life & 300th Post

http://thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com/2014/07/update-on-my-life-300th-post.html

Thursday, July 17, 2014. Update on my life and 300th Post. So I didn't wait as long to update you all on how things are going.but it's still too long between posts. To start preparing, D and I have decided to cut our cable this weekend. We have found out how to get Hulu Plus here in Canada, and the total cost for the year is 1/4 of the cost of our cable. It's insane how much TV costs. Well that's about everything here on my end. I'm still reading everyone's posts, just not commenting. Back to the hunt.

thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com

Thinthoughts: February 2014

http://thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com/2014_02_01_archive.html

Friday, February 28, 2014. And BOOM, I'm broke. I think the reason why I'm feeling especially down (as per my post yesterday) is because my friends are all saying things like,. 2014 is the year of success! So far this year, I got an amazing new job and bought a house. Next up, European cruise for my honeymoon! Keep it coming 2014.". And there are countless more posts or conversations that go like this. I push and try and strive and I have nothing to show for it. Anyways, it's that time of year. TAXES!

thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com

Thinthoughts: August 2014

http://thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com/2014_08_01_archive.html

Friday, August 8, 2014. So I'm counting down the days until this job is done. I agree Miranda and Kitty, good riddance lol. This day can't end soon enough. I just need to go home and cuddle on the couch with D and the cat. Only 2 hours left until I can call it a day. So I just removed my work e-mail off my phone. I think that's one way to let go. Now work can't follow me home if I don't want it to :) Next step: stop answering text messages right away (unless I'm at work). Links to this post. Anyways, my ...

thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com

Thinthoughts: March 2013

http://thinthoughts-tkaye03.blogspot.com/2013_03_01_archive.html

Tuesday, March 19, 2013. So I had my stats taken a couple weeks ago and then again this weekend. I was told I wasn't eating enough. I'm always stuffed doing this thing, and I now check in every 2 weeks so the guy can keep an eye on my eating. In 3 weeks time, I'm going to be keeping my class schedule as my gym schedule and upping my cardio big time. Time to practice running and train for the Spartan Race in June. Anyways that's all that's new with me. Thought I would keep you all in the loop. I'm still r...

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perfectandstarving.blogspot.com

Perfect and Starving

Wednesday, June 2, 2010. I've decided to go back to my old blog. If you'd like the link please email me at sarahewinchell @ gmail .com. PS; Im now prescribed to topamax! Monday, May 10, 2010. Back in the Day. The other day I read a post by Elle. I must be going crazy. It feels like this, at least for me. Living in a body that was on the verge of obese, and then not, it's like phantom excess weight is there and won't get out of your head. Why isn't this good enough? I wanted to stop gaining weight. Anxiet...

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