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scumstersDrawings and stories by Jonny Voss and alan McCormick
http://scumsters.blogspot.com/
Drawings and stories by Jonny Voss and alan McCormick
http://scumsters.blogspot.com/
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scumsters | scumsters.blogspot.com Reviews
https://scumsters.blogspot.com
Drawings and stories by Jonny Voss and alan McCormick
scumsters.blogspot.com
scumsters: May 2013
http://www.scumsters.blogspot.com/2013_05_01_archive.html
Words By Alan McCormick and drawings by Jonny Voss. Thursday, 23 May 2013. 8216;You must meet Matilda my dear’ said Norman. ‘But first things first: still wine or fizz; which kind of girl are you? 8216;A champagne girl of course’. 8216;Of course you are,’ cooed Norman. ‘Of course you are’. 8216;Hi de hi campers,’ sung Matilda, flexing a leg on her arrival by the mantelpiece. ‘And please excuse my sweat; I’m training for a half-marathon’. 8216;Don’t mind a little girl sweat do we? 8217; asked Norman.
scumsters: November 2014
http://www.scumsters.blogspot.com/2014_11_01_archive.html
Words By Alan McCormick and drawings by Jonny Voss. Thursday, 27 November 2014. From low, the semi-elongated-dwarf–bird-cat looks up at the absurd magnanimity of the metropolis and sighs. A cloud drops low and showers the steps before him. He will go no further. Up in a bone tree in the high part of the city, a squat owl surveys everything. He has nothing wise or profound to say. He is looking for mice. No matter, we know a bird who swallowed a fly . . . Monday, 24 November 2014. And the horn is done.
scumsters: THERE’S MORE TO LIFE THAN SITTING IN A PARK DRINKING BEER.
http://www.scumsters.blogspot.com/2015/02/theres-more-to-life-than-sitting-in.html
Words By Alan McCormick and drawings by Jonny Voss. Thursday, 26 February 2015. THERE’S MORE TO LIFE THAN SITTING IN A PARK DRINKING BEER. There’s more to life than sitting in a park drinking beer . Says I. Just look around, Jack: what do you see? A bunch of twats? The man with a dog: what’s he thinking? I can’t feed my dog so he’ll eat me. Your view is jaundiced. The wide-faced twit on stilts will get his stilt stuck in a drain and fall on his tit. What makes you so angry? Okay, do want another one then?
scumsters: FROM CHAOS
http://www.scumsters.blogspot.com/2014/11/from-chaos.html
Words By Alan McCormick and drawings by Jonny Voss. Thursday, 27 November 2014. From low, the semi-elongated-dwarf–bird-cat looks up at the absurd magnanimity of the metropolis and sighs. A cloud drops low and showers the steps before him. He will go no further. Up in a bone tree in the high part of the city, a squat owl surveys everything. He has nothing wise or profound to say. He is looking for mice. No matter, we know a bird who swallowed a fly . . . LITERACY AND GOOD MANNERS (COUNT FOR EVERYTHING UP.
scumsters: October 2013
http://www.scumsters.blogspot.com/2013_10_01_archive.html
Words By Alan McCormick and drawings by Jonny Voss. Tuesday, 22 October 2013. Thing is, you always have to wait hours for your meal. It’s their fucking job to come and serve you, and so you keep your back turned and wait. And you wait for hours. Literally for hours! You see these other people have their order taken; you even see some get their food. Pizzas! Where were they when you needed them? They circle you but you’re too quick and you bang into the kitchen. The chef hears you amidst the cla...
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dogsbodiesandscumsters.wordpress.com
STORYTELLER | Dogsbodies and Scumsters
https://dogsbodiesandscumsters.wordpress.com/2014/02/06/storyteller
February 6, 2014. The right side I think. I checked for a pulse on his neck, and started pumping his chest. I was embarrassed when the papers The Evening Standard. And The Daily Mail. Called me a heroine. ‘A brave and beautiful Aussie medic was first on the scene’ added some jerk on The Sun. Yeah, right. Next they’ll want me to pose in a white bikini with a stethoscope dangling between my breasts. An old school friend from Sydney saw me on satellite TV and emailed:. Did he say anything to you, Katie?
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AN EASTER PRAYER | Dogsbodies and Scumsters
https://dogsbodiesandscumsters.wordpress.com/2014/02/06/263
February 6, 2014. The fool that you are, Robert. Is that druff on your shoulder? It is not, you fiend. Oh, Meg, tarry a while. I will not, I cannot. Please, I’ll make an honest woman of you. The cheek of it, you don’t have it in you. My kisses say I do. Get your lips off me, man. If you love God you’d want to taste a bit of heaven. That’s sacrilege and blasphemy. It is not, it’s as pure as snow to love a woman. You big bastard with your clever words. Come on then, undress a little and show me your thigh.
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dogsbodiesandscumsters | Dogsbodies and Scumsters
https://dogsbodiesandscumsters.wordpress.com/author/dogsbodiesandscumsters
May 17, 2016. KOJAK Hello, Detective, where are you going? Call me Theo Theo, that’s a nice name Yes it is Is that your lollypop? Yes it is It looks sweet Yes it is I want you Yes you do I love you … Continue reading →. February 24, 2016. GO WILD IN THE COUNTRY. October 15, 2015. September 11, 2015. July 12, 2015. MESSAGE TO YOU Message 704 I think it’s imagining your hands that keeps me listening: fingers fair and tapered, palms smooth and dry, your sure confident grip sensitive yet subtly sensual. ...
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Cancer Bob | Dogsbodies and Scumsters
https://dogsbodiesandscumsters.wordpress.com/2013/12/12/cancer-bob-2
AN EASTER PRAYER →. December 12, 2013. Http:/ http:/ m.youtube.com/watch? Cancer Bob was originally written by me in response to one of Jonny’s pictures and appears in our book, Dogsbodies and Scumsters. The video is by German filmmaker, Raimar Oestreich. View all posts by dogsbodiesandscumsters →. This entry was posted in Uncategorized. AN EASTER PRAYER →. Leave a Reply Cancel reply. Enter your comment here. Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:. Address never made public).
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CLOWNING AROUND | Dogsbodies and Scumsters
https://dogsbodiesandscumsters.wordpress.com/2014/11/21/clowning-around-2
JAZZ ROCK →. November 21, 2014. Coco was more than usually annoyed; he was downright angry: ‘which of you freaks called me a clown? It was Bum Face Martin but he was never going to own up, so the swans confessed instead. I knew it,’ said Coco. ‘Never trust a bird that’s named after matches.’. Bum Face Martin sniggered and whispered ‘clown’ but Coco didn’t seem to hear, he was busy banging on about swans: ‘evil critters with long beaks and stupid feet! View all posts by dogsbodiesandscumsters →. Create a ...
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MESSAGE TO YOU | Dogsbodies and Scumsters
https://dogsbodiesandscumsters.wordpress.com/2015/07/12/message-to-you
CREAM CRACKERS →. July 12, 2015. I like to imagine your shiver as you react to the ‘s’ word but I’m not a violent person. Let’s just say if you were here I’d give you a very good talking to. Goodnight my love, Rita xxx. I’ve played it again and again and the more I play it the more I know you are saying it, ‘Rita, when? I missed you today. Have you gone and got a cold again? That would be the second of the year. I saw on Mail Online that you and her were out at an opening last night. She might ha...Sorry...
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SWALLOW | Dogsbodies and Scumsters
https://dogsbodiesandscumsters.wordpress.com/2013/11/26/swallow-2
Cancer Bob →. November 26, 2013. The freedom of East Africa was found in its vastness, its vitality. It could be lonely and frightening facing all that space outside, all that unbridled energy, but when I found you, when you took me in your arms and whispered that you’d always be there for me, then I could face anything, challenge freedom to take me as far as it could. Remember how we’d escape to the hotel by the Indian Ocean run by my friend, Chantelle? On the cruise ship back to England I danced with D...
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THE SPOT | Dogsbodies and Scumsters
https://dogsbodiesandscumsters.wordpress.com/2014/11/21/the-spot
CLOWNING AROUND →. November 21, 2014. Richard and Sue have a friend called Roger. He was originally her friend from university and was best man at their wedding. Twenty years later Roger has got himself in an undisclosed sticky situation and has asked to come and stay in their one bed flat in Tufnell Green. Three consecutive Tuesday nights are all he ‘needs’. Tonight is the first. Not too weak,’ shouts Roger from the bedroom. Richard is waiting with a glass when Roger returns to the lounge. Various whisk...
dogsbodiesandscumsters.wordpress.com
WATERWORLD | Dogsbodies and Scumsters
https://dogsbodiesandscumsters.wordpress.com/2014/02/21/waterworld-jpg
THE SPOT →. February 21, 2014. An old lady and an old man sit on an inflatable sofa. He said it was like 1938 to 1939 all over again. Teetering on the brink, dithering in the face of disaster. All all too late, nothing to do about it, we were all doomed. Doooomed! No one believed him. Earth heating up, waters rising, washing us away in the swell! Leave it. Let’s rest a little. I worked for him after they put him in a nursing home, tight as a tack he was. I don’t know you, do I? Their sofa wobbles in a sw...
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SOAPSCUM PRESENTS
Saturday, May 8, 2010. So Scott got a great interview in for Soap Scum. Yay for us, we are coming to a close this season only 4 more shows to go. It's been a rip roar of a 4th season.lots of guests, lots of laughs, and even a few tears. Anyways check out The Crown Royals before the end of may. Links to this post. Tuesday, March 30, 2010. Chapter 7 of The Crown Royals as I remember it. Distant cousin to the Royal family. This is a Cookiewhif. Admiral Shirley And High Chancellor of Whatchamacal. Mr Geoff H...
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SCUMSTACHE MILITIA
We were like those monkeys in Japan hanging out in hot springs all day or maybe like little lobsters crawling around in the ponds. World, meet Pizza! AND I SOLD MY FIRST PIECE EVER! Got a new welcome deck for the Candy Skateboard excursion to New York and my m42 adapter came in too! Did a Twin Peaks inspired grip job. Subscribe to: Posts (Atom). Simple template. Powered by Blogger.
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Words By Alan McCormick and drawings by Jonny Voss. Thursday, 26 February 2015. THERE’S MORE TO LIFE THAN SITTING IN A PARK DRINKING BEER. There’s more to life than sitting in a park drinking beer . Says I. Just look around, Jack: what do you see? A bunch of twats? The man with a dog: what’s he thinking? I can’t feed my dog so he’ll eat me. Your view is jaundiced. The wide-faced twit on stilts will get his stilt stuck in a drain and fall on his tit. What makes you so angry? Okay, do want another one then?
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