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January 14, 2016. All the things she was before…. I’m starting to enter my bed with trepidation around this time, now. Laying in bed at night, in the bashful darkness, thinking all the thoughts you shouldn’t believe. Years ago, I dated a guy; we’d get ready for bed while sharing our days. We’d read our books side by side. We’d be together. It was something I’d never experienced. That type of intimacy. It’s something I’ve yet to experience again. I gave him too much of me. Where you lived a normal life.

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byrdstheword.com | wordsthebyrd.wordpress.com Reviews

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January 14, 2016. All the things she was before…. I’m starting to enter my bed with trepidation around this time, now. Laying in bed at night, in the bashful darkness, thinking all the thoughts you shouldn’t believe. Years ago, I dated a guy; we’d get ready for bed while sharing our days. We’d read our books side by side. We’d be together. It was something I’d never experienced. That type of intimacy. It’s something I’ve yet to experience again. I gave him too much of me. Where you lived a normal life.

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1 byrdstheword com

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8 we’d sleep

9 i always do

10 never became famous

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byrdstheword.com | wordsthebyrd.wordpress.com Reviews

https://wordsthebyrd.wordpress.com

January 14, 2016. All the things she was before…. I’m starting to enter my bed with trepidation around this time, now. Laying in bed at night, in the bashful darkness, thinking all the thoughts you shouldn’t believe. Years ago, I dated a guy; we’d get ready for bed while sharing our days. We’d read our books side by side. We’d be together. It was something I’d never experienced. That type of intimacy. It’s something I’ve yet to experience again. I gave him too much of me. Where you lived a normal life.

INTERNAL PAGES

wordsthebyrd.wordpress.com

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endless pancakes | byrdstheword.com

https://wordsthebyrd.wordpress.com/2014/03/07/endless-pancakes

March 7, 2014. I frequent IHOP for many reasons. It reminds me of home. It’s right down the street. They always give me a booth and for some reason I’m able to write and be creative there. Also, they have endless pancakes. Pancakes are my favorite of the food groups. I love breakfast and I love dessert, pancakes bring those two together. Waitress walks up to the table and before she can even take my drink order I blurt out,. Me: Is your name Allison? Then, I verbally threw up all over the table. What if ...

2

the nightmare before Chicago | byrdstheword.com

https://wordsthebyrd.wordpress.com/2014/01/25/the-nightmare-before-chicago

January 25, 2014. The nightmare before Chicago. I needed a change: from my job, from my daily routine, from my life. Following weeks and months of self-loathing, it was time to make a move. After visiting Los Angeles, New York and Chicago, I decided Chicago was the place for me. More specifically, a school called The Second City. So I sold everything I owned, fit my life into a suitcase and bought a one-way ticket to Chicago. FRIDAY January 3, 2014. Flight 2096 Houston to Charlotte ON TIME. Me: Yes, ma’am.

3

May | 2015 | byrdstheword.com

https://wordsthebyrd.wordpress.com/2015/05

May 16, 2015. I hope you’ll wander with me. I haven’t written a blog in a long time because instead of writing about my life I was finally living it. When I started this blog I was sitting at a desk doing a job I couldn’t stand. Rather than do work I’d write funny stories of the ridiculous shenanigans that went on at my workplace. I hope you’ll wander with me. FOLLOW MY BLOG OR DIE. Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email. Blog at WordPress.com.

4

you’ve gotta be killing me | byrdstheword.com

https://wordsthebyrd.wordpress.com/2014/02/11/youve-gotta-be-killing-me

February 11, 2014. You’ve gotta be killing me. I’ve successfully avoided slipping and falling on snow and ice since moving to Chicago. However, that record ended last night. When Ralphie’s little brother, Randy, falls in the snow and can’t get up. That was me. Oh, I got it, I got it. I said to the cab driver as if he cared. He basically drove off while I was still lying in the street. What time is it? Last night was my first night out in Chicago. Good times. Thank god I don’t have a day job. Gail: Oh hey...

5

byrdstheword.com | Page 2

https://wordsthebyrd.wordpress.com/page/2

January 21, 2014. So now i’m a serial killer. I was sitting on my porch the other night when my neighbors came home. Now, we share a driveway so when they pulled up it was just three feet away from my face. I couldn’t very well run inside because that would be rude, right? Running into your house when your next door neighbors have clearly spotted you is just plain impolite, right? Standing around with new strangers I meet one night. Yeah, like you probably have a big vagina. HA! Others: HA.ha.ha. Hours l...

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January 14, 2016. All the things she was before…. I’m starting to enter my bed with trepidation around this time, now. Laying in bed at night, in the bashful darkness, thinking all the thoughts you shouldn’t believe. Years ago, I dated a guy; we’d get ready for bed while sharing our days. We’d read our books side by side. We’d be together. It was something I’d never experienced. That type of intimacy. It’s something I’ve yet to experience again. I gave him too much of me. Where you lived a normal life.

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