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The Bosom of My Loins

Saturday, September 8, 2007. Chapter 28: There Goes That Man-Mustached Dandruff-Flake Streamline Despot. Sergei was in the mood for love. It had been minutes since he downed his last paper cupful of strawberry Arbor Mist, and gazed longingly at the pixelated image of Tootie from The Facts of Life. Nevertheless, it was enough to put Sergei on the prowl. Yes," he thought. "Tonight the prey becomes the prey, and I shall be the Feral Invasive Species of Love.". He exclaimed, hurling Eleni over his shoulder w...

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The Bosom of My Loins | bosomloins.blogspot.com Reviews
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Saturday, September 8, 2007. Chapter 28: There Goes That Man-Mustached Dandruff-Flake Streamline Despot. Sergei was in the mood for love. It had been minutes since he downed his last paper cupful of strawberry Arbor Mist, and gazed longingly at the pixelated image of Tootie from The Facts of Life. Nevertheless, it was enough to put Sergei on the prowl. Yes, he thought. Tonight the prey becomes the prey, and I shall be the Feral Invasive Species of Love.. He exclaimed, hurling Eleni over his shoulder w...
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The Bosom of My Loins | bosomloins.blogspot.com Reviews

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Saturday, September 8, 2007. Chapter 28: There Goes That Man-Mustached Dandruff-Flake Streamline Despot. Sergei was in the mood for love. It had been minutes since he downed his last paper cupful of strawberry Arbor Mist, and gazed longingly at the pixelated image of Tootie from The Facts of Life. Nevertheless, it was enough to put Sergei on the prowl. Yes," he thought. "Tonight the prey becomes the prey, and I shall be the Feral Invasive Species of Love.". He exclaimed, hurling Eleni over his shoulder w...

INTERNAL PAGES

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1

The Bosom of My Loins: Chapter 27: You Are The Weakest Evolutionary Link (Goodbye!)

http://www.bosomloins.blogspot.com/2007/09/chapter-27-you-are-weakest-evolutionary.html

Saturday, September 8, 2007. Chapter 27: You Are The Weakest Evolutionary Link (Goodbye! I was accepted to participate on Senseless Reality Show #214. I could envision Sergei at that very moment, re-greasing his mustache in my personal bathroom, clogging up the drains with his thick, masculine clumps of tangled oily nose hairs. And then there were the citizens! Well, I was quite sure he was doing something. To them. But still, my drains! Thus another plan to reconquer my homeland had gang aft agley. ...

2

The Bosom of My Loins: Chapter 14: Here I Go Again on My Own.

http://www.bosomloins.blogspot.com/2007/09/chapter-14-here-i-go-again-on-my-own.html

Saturday, September 8, 2007. Chapter 14: Here I Go Again on My Own. Having achieved a good lather all over, I moved to take hold of the high-pressure rinse gun, when a hot pink limousine screeched into the bay and slammed into me, bruising my body like Paris Hilton after a fight with her boyfriend. I vaguely recall writhing and moaning atop the hood, half-naked, soaked and sudsy, struggling to focus on the face of the man standing above me. He handed me a backstage pass. "Oy! If you live.". Chapter 18: P...

3

The Bosom of My Loins: Chapter 20: Passion, Unbridled.

http://www.bosomloins.blogspot.com/2007/09/chapter-20-passion-unbridled.html

Saturday, September 8, 2007. Chapter 20: Passion, Unbridled. It was the dinner hour, the hour when dinner was served. Therefore, we sat down to eat dinner. Which was a heaping spoonful of dinner, served with a side of dinner. Over dinner, the Colonel questioned me about whence I came and when I was going to get off the property. So," began the Colonel, wiping spilled scotch from his Scotchguarded white suit, "where ya come from, ya she-whore? I said, where ya from, she-whore? What does that do? After muc...

4

The Bosom of My Loins: Chapter 19: A Tearful Goodbye.

http://www.bosomloins.blogspot.com/2007/09/chapter-19-tearful-goodbye.html

Saturday, September 8, 2007. Chapter 19: A Tearful Goodbye. And "Put that back.". He had briefly played a doctor on television in the Mexican Soap, "Salsa con Queso," appearing in two of its six episodes, and then wore the scrubs to his interview at Fort Lauderdale Presbyterian. They were so impressed that he came dressed and ready to work, they hired him on the spot. They were a very, very bad hospital. Oh why, why must I always give in to the sweet, beckoning siren song of the voices? Please, Katrina, ...

5

The Bosom of My Loins: Chapter 16: The Miracle of Christmas.

http://www.bosomloins.blogspot.com/2007/09/chapter-16-miracle-of-christmas.html

Saturday, September 8, 2007. Chapter 16: The Miracle of Christmas. Sure, he had memorized the lines, but sometimes she didn't believe. Him as an impotent middle-aged strongman masturbating his ego. In any event, chemical weapons were now buried somewhere in Greenland, and Inuit hunters would be digging them up any moment and arming themselves for sweet, sweet freedom from the Danes. This has no bearing on our plot, but is something for you to chew on. A threat to democracy. Posted by The Management.

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The Anarchy League: A Word from Johnny Footballhero, Naive Jock

http://anarchyleague.blogspot.com/2011/06/word-from-johnny-footballhero-naive.html

A band of vagabonds from across the distances of space and time, brought together for one purpose: To blog like it's 2003! Thursday, June 23, 2011. A Word from Johnny Footballhero, Naive Jock. It's me, Johnny Footballhero, eight-time all-star quarterback for Smalltownsville High! He also said I should maybe wear a helmet, but I told 'im if I don't wear one for the game, I ain't wearin' one to keep the ladies off me. How would I make out with them and stuff? Coach Gruffknock says I'm livin' a pipe dream; ...

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The Anarchy League: Another Pitch from Howard Leeds, Creator of Small Wonder

http://anarchyleague.blogspot.com/2011/06/another-pitch-from-howard-leeds-creator.html

A band of vagabonds from across the distances of space and time, brought together for one purpose: To blog like it's 2003! Wednesday, June 29, 2011. Another Pitch from Howard Leeds, Creator of Small Wonder. Hello to you, American viewing public. It's Howard Leeds here, the television genius who brought you 1986's hit series Small Wonder. The program that wasn't afraid to tell it like it is about the gritty underground world of men who craft robosexual servant girls to cater to their decadent whims. Kids ...

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The Anarchy League: A Missive from the Robo-Bigamist, Polygamist Droid

http://anarchyleague.blogspot.com/2011/07/missive-from-robo-bigamist-polygamist.html

A band of vagabonds from across the distances of space and time, brought together for one purpose: To blog like it's 2003! Thursday, July 7, 2011. A Missive from the Robo-Bigamist, Polygamist Droid. It's me, the Robo-Bigamist; the polygamist robot who lords over a harem of sweet, sweet flesh wives in keeping with my strict adherence to the teachings of the Book of Mormon. You don't see me complaining about the state of her gutters. Although you will now! I told you she packs a whallop! The Anarchy League...

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Improper Pronoun: December 2007

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Pop culture can't just beat itself up. Friday, December 14, 2007. Completely Useless Movie Previews: Alvin and the Chipmunks. Gentle readers, it's that time once again, wherein I tell you everything I think I know about a film based on a glance at the trailer. And then you trust me completely, as you are wont to do. Because you're gullible like that. Alvin and the Chipmunks. Big questions are presented in this movie, many left up in the air. Will Dave get rabies? Will the chipmunks take home the Grammy?

anarchyleague.blogspot.com anarchyleague.blogspot.com

The Anarchy League: Unnerving Thoughts from Wilkie Collins, Embittered Victorian Novelist

http://anarchyleague.blogspot.com/2011/07/unnerving-thoughts-from-wilkie-collins.html

A band of vagabonds from across the distances of space and time, brought together for one purpose: To blog like it's 2003! Tuesday, July 5, 2011. Unnerving Thoughts from Wilkie Collins, Embittered Victorian Novelist. Ahoy-hoy, tally-ho, and glad tidings to all! Tis I, Wilkie Collins, famed Victorian fictionist and gadabout about London-towne! Instead, I shall have to conjure more dubious and cunning methods of achieving my goal: the complete eradication of Charles Dickens from time itself! Hollywood bigs...

improperpronoun.blogspot.com improperpronoun.blogspot.com

Improper Pronoun: July 2007

http://improperpronoun.blogspot.com/2007_07_01_archive.html

Pop culture can't just beat itself up. Friday, July 20, 2007. Completely Useless Movie Previews: Who's Your Caddy? I speak, of course, about reruns of Caddyshack. But let's also give a little look at Who's Your Caddy? The most blatant unauthorized rip-off in the slob-golf genre since Caddyshack II: The Disemboweling. Sit back, enjoy. Just don't spill your drink everywhere, it makes my eyes watery. Very little is known about Who's Your Caddy? Okay, can they film a cheap race comedy together? I'm going to ...

improperpronoun.blogspot.com improperpronoun.blogspot.com

Improper Pronoun: Completely Useless Movie Previews: Alvin and the Chipmunks

http://improperpronoun.blogspot.com/2007/12/completely-useless-movie-previews-alvin.html

Pop culture can't just beat itself up. Friday, December 14, 2007. Completely Useless Movie Previews: Alvin and the Chipmunks. Gentle readers, it's that time once again, wherein I tell you everything I think I know about a film based on a glance at the trailer. And then you trust me completely, as you are wont to do. Because you're gullible like that. Alvin and the Chipmunks. Big questions are presented in this movie, many left up in the air. Will Dave get rabies? Will the chipmunks take home the Grammy?

improperpronoun.blogspot.com improperpronoun.blogspot.com

Improper Pronoun: August 2008

http://improperpronoun.blogspot.com/2008_08_01_archive.html

Pop culture can't just beat itself up. Tuesday, August 12, 2008. A Dreaded Sunny Day. It's a dreaded sunny day, so I'll meet you at the cemet'ry gates. Keats and Yeats may be on your. Side, but weird lover Wilde is on mine. As well as. Ezra "The Ground" Pound. His virulent antisemitism is matched only by his thirst for everyone else's blood. Along with Dorothy Shakespear and Olga Rudge, he'll form a ménage à disembowelment. Trying to find out may be hazardous to your health. TS "PS. I'll Kill U" Eliot.

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The Bosom of My Loins

Saturday, September 8, 2007. Chapter 28: There Goes That Man-Mustached Dandruff-Flake Streamline Despot. Sergei was in the mood for love. It had been minutes since he downed his last paper cupful of strawberry Arbor Mist, and gazed longingly at the pixelated image of Tootie from The Facts of Life. Nevertheless, it was enough to put Sergei on the prowl. Yes," he thought. "Tonight the prey becomes the prey, and I shall be the Feral Invasive Species of Love.". He exclaimed, hurling Eleni over his shoulder w...

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