foldsfive.blogspot.com
FoldsFive: My Big Fat Blog About My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding
http://foldsfive.blogspot.com/2011/01/my-big-fat-blog-about-my-big-fat-gypsy.html
Thursday, January 27, 2011. My Big Fat Blog About My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding. 8220;Roll up, roll up! We have all manner of sights, sounds and spectacles for you, young one. The wooden woman, with skin of the richest mohagony. To find her age, you’d have to cut ‘er in ‘alf and count the rings! And, oh, the wonder – the WONDER – of their matin’ rituals! Borderin’ on rape, it is! A dress so gargantuan, it injures the wearer! One of ‘em even bleedin’ lights up like a Christmas tree! And, ladies and gentlemen, ...
foldsfive.blogspot.com
FoldsFive: Poppycock.
http://foldsfive.blogspot.com/2011/09/poppycock.html
Sunday, September 18, 2011. Those of you who persist in performing that evil activity of social networking on Facebook (solely reserved for people organising riots, dontchaknow) may have seen the following status update being bandied about today. (On the subject of which, isn't it unfortunate that the word 'bandied' itself isn't bandied around every often? Anyway, the status update;. Oh no, you won't remember that because it never fucking happened. Reality check - IT IS NOTHING TO DO WITH MINORITIES SAYI...
foldsfive.blogspot.com
FoldsFive: The Poplar Tree was unavailable for comment.
http://foldsfive.blogspot.com/2011/07/poplar-tree-was-unavailable-for-comment.html
Friday, July 01, 2011. The Poplar Tree was unavailable for comment. 65279;Ever have one of those days when you’re feeling really good, in fact rather. Usually I’d recommend a good session of watching Jersey Shore. Or My Super Sweet Sixteen. To bring your cynicism levels up to just shy of a simmering rage, but you’ll be relieved to know that there’s another alternative. Simply look at the Daily Mail website. All bar one. The fucking Daily Mail. That good mood you were in? They even perform the famo...
foldsfive.blogspot.com
FoldsFive: Jeremy Clarkson - "My work here is done".
http://foldsfive.blogspot.com/2011/12/jeremy-clarkson-my-work-here-is-done.html
Thursday, December 01, 2011. Jeremy Clarkson - "My work here is done". The 51 year mission of Jeremy Clarkson was deemed an "absolute success" by the man himself yesterday as calculations revealed that he has now managed to achieve his admittedly lofty goal of offending every single fucking last human being on the planet. Telly Blind idiots.". It got quite easy after that", Clarkson reminisces, "Lorry drivers all murder prostitutes, anything made by Rover, Vauxhall Vectra drivers, all an absolute doddle&...
foldsfive.blogspot.com
FoldsFive: In Space no one can hear you shriek like a child
http://foldsfive.blogspot.com/2014/10/in-space-no-one-can-hear-you-shriek.html
Tuesday, October 21, 2014. In Space no one can hear you shriek like a child. There have been precisely three occasions when I have been known to shriek whilst using a computer or video-game console. To say that there's an alien on board the space station is as much a spoiler warning as letting you know that the new Call of Duty game contains guns, killing and nine year old American children calling you a faggot. This game is even scarier than those nine year old children. It's no secret I'm a huge fan.
foldsfive.blogspot.com
FoldsFive: Send the buggers back
http://foldsfive.blogspot.com/2010/11/send-buggers-back.html
Friday, November 12, 2010. Send the buggers back. Send the buggers back,. Send the buggers back. These aren't the ones I wanted, son,. So I'm sending them straight back. I said I wanted white ones,. But they've send us bloody black. I'm going to put the lid back on. And send the buggers back". When mass idiocy takes hold of acquaintances on facebook, it's a perfect opportunity for a 'friend cull'. The last opportunity I had to do this. With too much time on their hands and five lighters for a paaahnd fro...
foldsfive.blogspot.com
FoldsFive: "I'm David Court. Author. Dreamweaver. Visionary. Plus actor. You're about to enter the world of my imagination."
http://foldsfive.blogspot.com/2014/11/im-david-court-author-dreamweaver.html
Sunday, November 16, 2014. I'm David Court. Author. Dreamweaver. Visionary. Plus actor. You're about to enter the world of my imagination.". I have a new blog to keep the writing separate from the angry, swearing rants or essays on how I hate bosses in video-games. I'd love it if you'd take a look. Thanks to Simon Myers for the Garth Merenghi title quote). Sunday, November 16, 2014. Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom). The Pixelmash Collection - Star Wars. My Big Fat Blog About My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding.
foldsfive.blogspot.com
FoldsFive: Browns Bar - Coventry, warts and all
http://foldsfive.blogspot.com/2012/06/browns-bar-coventry-warts-and-all.html
Thursday, June 28, 2012. Browns Bar - Coventry, warts and all. Based on the 83k (! Oh wait, hang on, what? He DIDN'T do any of those things? You could have fooled me, based on the amount of foaming anger that has emerged. And the reason for this anger? On Monday, Browns refused to serve Soldiers in uniform who were at the Cathedral for the day for the sad occasion of burying one of their own. Pretty shit thing for a bar to do, right? Absolutely. Nobody is disputing that. As far as I can recall, Browns ha...
foldsfive.blogspot.com
FoldsFive: The Pixelmash Collection - Star Wars
http://foldsfive.blogspot.com/2008/06/pixelmash-collection.html
Friday, June 06, 2008. The Pixelmash Collection - Star Wars. Because it would appear that via the wonders of google analytics that a number of searches are coming through to this blog via people looking for 'foldsfive' and 'pixelmash', here are episodes 4-6 of Star Wars for your dubious pleasure. An interview I did for some web magazine way, way back about their making can be found here. Friday, June 06, 2008. June 23, 2012 at 2:51 AM. May 21, 2013 at 2:50 PM. May 21, 2013 at 4:20 PM. Blogs you must read.
foldsfive.blogspot.com
FoldsFive: DPD Couriers are shit
http://foldsfive.blogspot.com/2010/07/dpd-couriers-are-shit.html
Saturday, July 17, 2010. DPD Couriers are shit. Having refused the lure of the iphone, I ordered a sparkly new HTC Desire from Orange on Thursday. I paid an extra eleven quid for Saturday delivery, and duly waited. Got a text from their Courier firm (DPD) this morning telling me it would be delivered between 12:48 and 13:48. So far, so impressed - until I checked the tracking status of my order at half one today to find said phone has apparently was delivered at 13:11 and signed for an OBRIAN. UPDATE: Ra...