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themerry-widow.blogspot.com

The Merry Widow: June 2012

http://themerry-widow.blogspot.com/2012_06_01_archive.html

This is just a blog for me to discuss my thoughts about widowhood, motherhood, single-hood, and any other -hoods I'm experiencing or will experience. Friday, June 15, 2012. Sing a New Song, Chiquitita: Of Grandmothers and ABBA. What in the world can a 30-year-old bit of pop fluff possibly do with the death of my grandmother? What exactly does this have to do with that ABBA song I posted in the title, you ask? Otra vez quiero compartir tu alegria, Chiquitita. Once again, I want to share your joy.

themerry-widow.blogspot.com

The Merry Widow: February 2009

http://themerry-widow.blogspot.com/2009_02_01_archive.html

This is just a blog for me to discuss my thoughts about widowhood, motherhood, single-hood, and any other -hoods I'm experiencing or will experience. Monday, February 02, 2009. One of the most frustrating things in dealing with all this has been the idea that I did everything right, and for what? My life seems to be a series of jokes, and I just want to breathe for a minute. I don't think that's too much to ask for. I just want a simple life. God, can't you help someone out? Subscribe to: Posts (Atom).

themerry-widow.blogspot.com

The Merry Widow: January 2009

http://themerry-widow.blogspot.com/2009_01_01_archive.html

This is just a blog for me to discuss my thoughts about widowhood, motherhood, single-hood, and any other -hoods I'm experiencing or will experience. Sunday, January 25, 2009. 4 years ago, my world was rocked. I was on the cusp of the rest of my life: recently graduated from law school, happy in my clerkship, pregnant with our first child, and happy with Him. In a little over two months, we were going to be parents! We were happily chugging along in our life together. Pablo, this one's for you. Another t...

afterthefire-phoenix.blogspot.com

After the fire, the fire still burns: August 2012

http://afterthefire-phoenix.blogspot.com/2012_08_01_archive.html

After the fire, the fire still burns. One widow tries to figure out life after death.her own. Thursday, August 30, 2012. I will love you forever; whatever happens. Until I die and after I die, and when I find my way out of the land of the dead, I'll drift about forever, all my atoms, until I find you again. Phillip Pullman, The Amber Spyglass. Saturday, August 4, 2012. Wednesday, August 1, 2012. Subscribe to: Posts (Atom). Soaring Spirits Loss Foundation. The Girl Left Behind. Young Widows Bulletin Board.

denisesnextchapter.blogspot.com

Denise's Next Chapter: January 2012

http://denisesnextchapter.blogspot.com/2012_01_01_archive.html

Monday, January 16, 2012. The other night my boyfriend PJ wasn't feeling well, and I felt like things were a little off between us. It really wasn't a big deal, but when I tried to have a rational conversation with him about it, something happened that's been happening an awful lot lately: I started to cry. But when I tearfully try to explain all this to PJ, when I say, "I swear, I am not usually like this! But Ely's death knocked something loose in me. I cried hard that first week.oh, how I crie...Maybe...

denisesnextchapter.blogspot.com

Denise's Next Chapter: The Under Toad

http://denisesnextchapter.blogspot.com/2014/02/the-under-toad.html

Tuesday, February 4, 2014. When I last wrote here, over a year and a half ago, I said that in my next post I was going to publicly admit a major addiction. Was I talking about my alcoholism? Seems unlikely, since I was still drinking at the time. My original intention has long since been buried under the sands of time, but for the record, yes, I am an alcoholic. I quit drinking December 28, 2012, and the farther away I get from my last drink, the more sure I am about that. What if I become so convinced I...

afterthefire-phoenix.blogspot.com

After the fire, the fire still burns: July 2014

http://afterthefire-phoenix.blogspot.com/2014_07_01_archive.html

After the fire, the fire still burns. One widow tries to figure out life after death.her own. Sunday, July 6, 2014. Aware and oblivious at the same time. As I have mentioned here before. The high sign came about 2 weeks ago, and I immediately pulled up my calendar to figure out which dates would work best for me, settling on July 14-17 as the stretch where the fewest things would have to be canceled. So I must have seen it on my calendar, because it's there (as if I'd ever forget). The Girl Left Behind.

afterthefire-phoenix.blogspot.com

After the fire, the fire still burns: A Not-Very-Good, but Heartfelt, Poem on the Occasion of What Should've Been Your 64th Birthday

http://afterthefire-phoenix.blogspot.com/2015/03/a-not-very-good-but-heartfelt-poem-on.html

After the fire, the fire still burns. One widow tries to figure out life after death.her own. Sunday, March 15, 2015. A Not-Very-Good, but Heartfelt, Poem on the Occasion of What Should've Been Your 64th Birthday. I make these offers and concessions. As if I were in a position to negotiate. As if somehow landing on the right combination. Of what I'd settle for. Would unlock the door you're hidden behind. As if something could change now. That hasn't in all these preceding years. To a deaf universe. Sure ...

afterthefire-phoenix.blogspot.com

After the fire, the fire still burns: July 2012

http://afterthefire-phoenix.blogspot.com/2012_07_01_archive.html

After the fire, the fire still burns. One widow tries to figure out life after death.her own. Tuesday, July 17, 2012. The day I found out. 6 years ago this morning, I called the cops in California to confirm the worst.  I had left only the hope of ignorance; I was pretty sure he was gone, but somehow, having it confirmed was a zillion times worse. So, you know, progress. . Friday, July 13, 2012. Sunday, July 8, 2012. Has talked a lot about how, when youre no longer actively grieving, and no longer sad al...

young-widows.livejournal.com

Weddings and Memories - young widows

http://young-widows.livejournal.com/126917.html

Weddings and Memories - young widows. Young Widows Bulletin Board. July 11th, 2009. 10:36 pm - Weddings and Memories. I dreamt you seduced me. Just to walk away. I dreamt you inspired. Then rewired what I say. I dreamt you spread your bottom wings. And pulled me to the bed. But then I woke up feeling nauseous. You danced around my head. The more I analyze my feelings, the more I think that I hate things. How long, how long have you been down? How long, how long have you been down? And sometimes, I swear ...